darcy.

ACK!

2006-11-07T19:20:00.000+08:00

WHOO FOOO!!! long time no blog!!! ahhh!!!!!

man the a's are stressful. ohmygosh. its NOVEMBER. everybody. remember.remember. the TWENTY-SIXTH OF NOVEMBER. it's COMING. WHOO FOO!!!.

Safe. i hope. finally. it is coming.after one hell of a whilrwind of a year.
so many things happen.
ups.
and downs. aha. damn.
friendships.
whoa.
must remember. REMEMEBer.
do ppl with amnesia forget their own birthdays?
i know what i want.
i want EMMA WATSON for christmas.
or not.

i owe ado her magazine.
i need to remember christmas is coming.

OI DARCY. you idiot lah you. can you blog for YOURSELF. sheesh. ahaha bastard. tut tut. oh. btw. gd luck. YOU NV REPLY my sms. hmph. some FREND. jaoibqo;iybhqoiyq.

God save the beach

2006-07-03T21:30:00.000+08:00

UPDATE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Okay... to be completely honest with u.. its been ages ever since it was actually me.. daryl bryan chee wei jing jong jang who actually updated his own blog=) Its been kept alive by ado and a few others.. want my password?? heh heh. Its impossible to deceipher. Anw! I would first like to declare how badly i am gonna fail my mid year exams!

Honestly... i am very used to the system where u take ur mid yr exams b4 u go for holidays so that u can do all the things u wanna do.. after all.. thats why its dubbed a "holiday". Okay.. so we dont take the exams b4 the term ends.. we are supposed to study during the hols. I find that EXTREMELY difficult. Firstly.. the hols is when you go do all the things that u cant normally do during school term like go overseas or go to the beach or camp or blah blah. Okay... this is my june holiday recap.

First week: Term just ended! Time to take off ur socks and just relaxxx... dota and talking to friends help do the trick. There is also a church camp for sat, sun and monday. Brilliant camp that one.. made many new friends.. ALL SMALLER THAN ME!! in age and in height! (sec 2s). End of week 1.

Second week: LEADERSHIP TRAINING CAMP! Now.. this is a week long thing.. so i'll just cramp it all into one week. Now!! i went for this camp last year.. learnt tonnes of stuff... had fun and so i wanted to share this fun and impart whatever knowledge i had. I'm a very people person.. if i was left alone on an island i would die.. or start talking to coconuts. My team "Fan-tastic" pwned everyone during the 20KM challenge.. madness..!!! i havent been to sembawang.. dont think u would want to either anyway.. industrial metropolis.. My teamm.... omg.. made up of CRAZY ASS PPLE who i have come to love and respect. Insisted on joggin all the time.. we were over taken early.. but we kept the pressure.. and a few strategic pit stops (coz there were stations) and we overtook our closest rivals who were 8 mins ahead of us in terms of pit stops... then from there we peeled away from the rest.. A classic=) They made me run... of all things.. but satisfying no doubt.. they'll be great leaders.. i have felt it.. the force is strong in them.

Okay!! Weeko Threeo: Hang on there... i cant really remember what i did during this week... OH WAIT!! I DO!! oh had parties!! and wasted away at home.. exciting no? And THE WORLD CUP STARTS!!

Week 4 and final week: Do u honestly think i can study with the world cup on tv?

That about wraps it up... whaddya think my results will be like? ahahah anw i just wanna let u know that if u wanna make money from me.. or like LEGALLY win money from me.. just make a bet with me.. I WILL DEFT LOSE THE BET. I have lost 95 bucks on bettin for soccer so far. I tell u my luck.. just isnt there right now.. so nows a good time to earn all the money u might have lost back.

Today? today we had a 31st SC and 32nd SC bonding session.. its a new thing.. but kudos to eddie boy who coordinated it. Okay.. i was supposed to play soccer and be in school at 7.30 for warm up and pre game ceremony. I set my alarm for 5 OKAY! its just that.. i killed it when it got annoying.. so yeah.. busy at dream land doing some dreamins all the way till 8 when my dad woke me up... my love, my saviour and my relatively "close neighbour" SUE JEAN summoned me!! I changed and choinged in a cab. Everyone was pretty upset that i was late.. i was a damn bastard la... Okay.. so i got there in a cab.. made the cab driver crazy by making him drive like initial D style. I got there 5 to 10 mins after they started i think. Then soon after i scored the opener with a well timed first time volley i might add after the opp. keeper scrambled the ball away which flew towards me.. before it touched the ground.. i smacked it hard and low.. it went straight into the btm left hand corner... thats a goal i WILL rememeber! Iggy scored a nice goal with a solid drive.. mark p was on fire man!! beautiful goals from him.. scored 5 all together. At half time it was 3-0 to 31st SC. Then we waited for a bit.. then carried on aft the gals netball match. From there... i scored another goal.. the ball was allowed to run towards me.. thru the centre and i tucked it into the bmt right corner of the goal.. pretty oaky goal. THEN THE MOTHER OF IT ALL!! PINOY'S GOAL! I think it was actually a clearance rather than a shot at goal but who cares!! it went in!. The ball was blasted super high into the sky.. but it was going towards the opponents goal where eddie was. The ball dip fast and was GOING IN! Eddie and the keeper struggled to get the ball!! But they just whacked into each other so much so that they completely missed the ball which just bounced in!! FANTASTIC! We conceded a fair bit.. wasnt good.. but ah well.. GREAT GAME MAN!
Then aft that match we choinged down to sentosa!! mad beach day..anw i lazy to cont writings... u justs waits for another times k? ahahha ttttoooodddllleeessss!!!

2006-06-22T20:25:00.000+08:00

today:
i slept at six am. wonderful sleep. was dreaming of happy thoughts when the most horrible of horrible things happened. my phone rang. i tried to shut it out. JJUST ONE MORE MINUTE, i thought. but no. as phones are apt to do, due to the determined people on the other side of teh line. so, groggily i stumble about (my hand that is) and i grab my phone.

me: Hello? [imagine a really sleepy me answering, hair ruffled (ooo sexy FOOOOOOO! * shakes hips*) and if u cant, ur welcomed to call me at 9.45 am on a saturday. my phone no is 912345678.serious.back to story]

annoying person on the other side: Hello! *me thinks:omg i hate morning people* GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE THE WORLD SAYS HELLO. Are you awake yet?

me: You woke me up.....[still really groggy] *person on other side thinks: duh, the whole point of calling in the wee hours of the morning IS to wake u up.course i(DARCY) dont know that at that point of time*

once again annoying person on teh otherside: wakey wakey time to wake up don't be LATE!!

me: okok. yeah ok. i'll see you at 11. gimme 5 more mins.

annoying person: ok.*cheerily i note. silly morning people* see you then.

me: *mumbling something incohenrent about going back to bed* yeah yeah later.

i put the phone down and go straight back to sleep. well, being me, i wake up much later. i think. i can't relaly recall. anyhow. i panic. i strat thinking. OH SHOOT I NEED TO GET A CAB IM GONNA BE LATE AHHHH!!!!. so im about to rush out of the house and my dad stops me.

dad: where u going?

me: *using the voice wehre im panicky and thinking DONT BOTHER ME* town town.

dad: hey im going to town!

me: * thinking fast with a sigh of relief* u can bring me then?!

dad: sure, only that you need to wait a bi cos im bringing allan as well *allan being our neighbour*

me: sure! *thinking in relief. anything to save money:D*

the time is 11am. on the dot. i get an sms.

sms: DUDE dont stand me up man! im sitting here waiting.

me reply: HOOOOOOO Shit! kk i'm on my way there. Start Studying!

MEANWHILE: ado is happily sitting in coffeebean in taka wondering where the hell everybody is. she stupidly buys a pure chocolate ice blended drink which she forces herself to drink.

back to me.

me send another sms: *being the considerate person i am adn knowing that peopl like explanations*Study! Study! im on my way. my dad is giving me a lift. but i had to wait for my neighbour to come cos hes following my dad. im really sorry... hang on aye?

MEANWHILE: back to ado. she gags on her horrible choco drink and goes and buys another drink. this time. a SNAPPLE. can never go wrong with that.:D she sits and is STILL waiting... when FINALLY someone pops up. Jeremy. SURPRISE! hes here BEFORE darcy.. its already 11.45 by now. both sit there wondering wads happening to darcy.

back to me.
i get out of hte car and make my way to coffeebean.happy happy i walk along looking at teh shops opening.i reach coffeebean and walk in, not seeing anyone.i look aroudn and see ado and soemone sitting on teh other side. so i walk out and that other person turns around. OOOO its jeremy.... haha being me the wonderful oh so great INSUFFEREABLE mr darcy.. i make teh OOOO face and walk right by.. seeing ados exasperated face.turn about and show the heart sign with my fingers. haha just fooling around. all of us are great FRENDS anyhow.:D

so we settle down for many hours of studying. theres alot of reminiscing of good ole st pat days.. leaving ado horrified at guy antics. talking about how jeremy's coffee is actually blended crap.. organic goes rite in comes rite out.. over adn over again. fresh out of the oven. hot and crispy. explains hte presence of all the blenders in coffee bean:D halfway thro jasmine comes arund to wait for her frends.only one comes in the end. she wears this dress and i get thrashed by GIRL POWER on girls sense of fashion. cos jasmine wore a dress adn was contemplating wearing jeans inside. ado on teh other hand just went along and wore a skirt over her pants. cant seem to make up your mind can you? at least jasmine knows she wants to wear a DRESS.

so its 5ish and we leave to go around looking at sport shops. meet up with otehr fellow cj dudes.we go to WATSONS and i buy WILLIAMS CONDOMS for him. we compare prices and flavours and brands and sizes material and decide on LOVE amour one 20% discount off.. in a packet of 3.:D transaction goes along smoothly adn the three of us contemplate the many things that willie might want to use teh condom for... maybe on monday ill say:

let us remember that we are now and always in the most holy presence of god oh and by hte way willie and anne ive got ur condoms here so come and collect them from me later.:D

how embarrassing. if only...:D

we hang about teh aquarium watching this fish who couldnt make up its mind whether it wanted to commit sucide or not. i finally settled on that maybe he got banished to the corner of the tank by the mafia big boss.and he tried to defeat death by heading straight down and turnnig just before it hit the ground. he kept swimming up like he wanted to swim out of hte tank to commit suicide. other wise, he kept swimming up adn down and all around counting the length of the tank.:D

5.35pm.. at the mrt station and ado wants to buy hair rubber bands and me being the great frend i follow. it ends up being 6pm before we finally leave. i cab back with jeremy and now im at home being ONCE AGAIN annoyed by ado. some people never stop talking:D

thats my day.:D cheerios

Not A Hallmark

2006-05-28T19:57:00.000+08:00

These are cards you'll most likely never see on a Hallmark...

"Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder:... What was I thinking?"

"Congratulations on your wedding day!.... Too bad no one likes your wife."

"How could two people as beautiful as you.... have such an ugly baby?"

"I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love.... After having met you, I've changed my mind."

"I must admit, you brought Religion in my life.... I never believed in Hell until I met you."

"As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am.... that you're not here to ruin it for me."

"As you grow older, Mum, I think of all the gifts you've given me. Like the need for therapy..."

"Thanks for being a part of my life!!!.... I never knew what evil was before this!"

"Before you go,.... I would like you to take this knife out of my back. You'll probably need it again."

"Someday I hope to get married.... but not to you."

"You look great for your age.... Almost Lifelike!"

"When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.... Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise."

"I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend.... So here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys."

"We have been friends for a very long time.... What do you say we call it quits?"

"I'm so miserable without you.... It's almost like you're here."

"Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.... Did you ever find out who the father was?"

"You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket.... I'd miss you heaps and think of you often."

"Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday.... So we're having you put to sleep."

"Your kisses are sweet, your hugs are passionate.... But compared to your sister, they're only second rate."

Getting Weighed

2006-05-28T19:53:00.000+08:00

Joe took his blind date to the carnival. "What would you like to do first, Kim?" asked Joe.

I want to get weighed," she said. They ambled over to the weight guesser. He guessed 120 pounds. She got on the scale; it read 117 and she won a prize.

Next, the couple went on the Ferris Wheel. When the ride was over, Joe again asked Kim what she would like to do.

"I want to get weighed," she said.

Back to the weight guesser they went. Since they had been there before, he guessed her correct weight, and Joe lost his dollar.

The couple walked around the carnival and again he asked where to next. "I want to get weighed," she responded.

By this time, Joe figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her roommate, Laura, asked her about the blind date, "How'd it go?"

Kim responded, "Oh, Waura, it was wousy."

The Time

2006-05-28T19:45:00.000+08:00

A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.
Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.

Calling out to the patient, the man says, "Pardon me, sir, but do you have the time?"

The patient calls back, "One moment!" and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter's level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.

With a compass, the patient locates north and with a steel ruler, measures the precise length of the shadow cast by the stick.

Withdrawing a slide rule from his pocket, the patient calculates rapidly, then swiftly packs up all his tools and turns back to the pedestrian, saying, "It is now precisely 3:29 pm, provided today is August 16th, which I believe it is."

The man can't help but be impressed by this demonstration, and sets his watch accordingly.

Before he leaves, he says to the patient, "That was really quite remarkable, but tell me, what do you do on a cloudy day, or at night, when the stick casts no shadow?" The patient holds up his wrist and says, "I suppose I'd just look at my watch."

It's Tough Being a Guy

2006-05-28T19:43:00.000+08:00

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.

If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist. If you're not, you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

Actual Answering Machine Messages

2006-05-28T19:31:00.000+08:00

"My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished."
"A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message."

"Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial-aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money."

(Narrator's voice): There Dale sits, reading a magazine. Suddenly...the telephone rings! The bathroom e-x-p-l-o-d-e-s into a veritable maelstrom of toilet paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms windmilling at incredible speeds! Will he make it in time? Alas, no! His valiant effort is in vain! The bell hath sounded. Thou must leave a message."

"Hi!...Now, you say something."

"Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?"

(From a Japanese friend in Toronto)..."He-lo! This is Sa-to. If you leave message, I call you soon. If you leave *sexy* message, I call sooner!"

"Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. .Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets."

"Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck with taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone."

"Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you."

"This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call."

"Hi. I am probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you."

"Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back."

"If you are a burglar, then we're at home cleaning our weapons and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home and it's safe to leave us a message."

"You're growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone, you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number, and a message."

"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of your voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However, our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak

clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."

"Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us."

"Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right...real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll get back to you."

Opposites

2006-05-28T19:27:00.000+08:00

Two friends, one an Optimist and the other a Pessimist could never quite agree on any topic of discussion. One day the Optimist decided he had found a good way to pull his Pessimistic friend out of his way of continual Pessimistic way of thinking. The Optimist owned a huntin' dog that could walk on water.
His plan? Take the Pessimist and the dog out duck hunting in a boat. They got out into the middle of the lake, and the Optimist shot down a duck...the dog immediately walked out across the water, retrieved the duck, and walked back to the boat.

The Optimist looked at his Pessimistic friend and said, "What do you think about that?"

The Pessimist replied, "That dog can't swim, can he?"

Abbott and Costello on Buying a Computer

2006-05-28T19:14:00.000+08:00

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the names Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my names Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend office with windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, lets just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W."
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?

ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: If its a long movie I also want to see reel 2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them?
ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great, with what?
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO; OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
ABBOTT: You click the blue "1."
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOTT: The blue "1."
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue "W"?
ABBOTT: The blue 1 is Real One and the blue W is Word.

COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there's three words in "office for windows"!
ABBOTT: No, just one. but its the most popular Word in the world.
COSTELLO: It is?
ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It Pretty much wiped out all the other Words.
COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even Part of Office.
COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!|

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off??
ABBOTT: Click on "START"..........

Speeding

2006-05-28T19:10:00.000+08:00

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half! drawn gun.

Officer #2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer #2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer #2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer #2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.

Officer #2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer #2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

You know you're lost in cyberspace when...

2006-05-28T19:01:00.000+08:00

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 4.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.

7. You make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.

8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.

10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.

11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.

12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.

13. Every commercial on television has a website at the bottom of the screen.

14. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

15. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)

17. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

18. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

19. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

20. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list AND NOW U R LOL at yourself. Go on, forward this to your friends...you know you want to! ;>)

figure it out:D

2006-05-28T18:59:00.000+08:00

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that:

electricians can be delighted
musicians denoted
cowboys deranged
models deposed
tree surgeons debarked
and dry cleaners depressed?

Let's Make Sure

2006-05-28T18:58:00.000+08:00

Jeff and Steve are out hunting in the middle of nowhere. They've been sitting there for hours when, all of a sudden, Steve just keels over.

Jeff grabs his cell phone and calls 911. "My buddy just dropped dead!", he yells.

The 911 operator speaks very calmly and says, "OK...just relax...let me help you. First...let's make sure he's dead."

"OK." There's a short pause, then a loud bang like a gun firing. Then, Joe picks up the phone again.

"OK...what now?"

Read the Def

2006-05-28T18:57:00.000+08:00

A panda walks into a diner, pulls up a chair and orders a sandwich.

After he eats, he pulls out a gun, shoots the waiter and heads for the door.

The owner yells, "Hey...you just shot the waiter, and now you're gonna leave without paying the tab?"

The panda calls back: "I'm a panda, dude. Look it up!" and walks out.

The owner grabs a dictionary and looks up panda:

"A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinctive black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves

Game Show Question

2006-05-28T18:55:00.000+08:00

Incredibly, John had survived to the final round of his favorite TV game show.

The host looked at his cue cards and said, "John...this last question is for ALL the marbles. That means there's a MILLION dollars on the line!"

"But this is a two-part question. Here's a hint: The second half is easier. Which part would you like to try first?"

"Well, Alex...I think I'll try the second part!"

"Alright, John...here we go. (cues the music) Here's the question: 'And in what year did it happen?'"

Psychiatric Hotline

2006-05-28T18:49:00.000+08:00

Thank you for calling The Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1...repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are anal-retentive, please hold.
If you have anxiety-related disorder, just start pressing numbers at random.
If you are phobic, don't press anything...

Words Women Use

2006-05-28T18:47:00.000+08:00

"FINE":
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
"FIVE MINUTES"
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

"NOTHING"
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with 'Fine.'

"GO AHEAD" (With Raised Eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over Nothing and will end with the word "Fine."

"GO AHEAD" (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

"LOUD SIGH"
This is not actually a word, but is a onverbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing."

"SOFT SIGH"
Again, not a word, but a nonverbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.

"THAT'S OKAY"
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow".

"GO AHEAD"
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

"PLEASE DO"
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

"THANKS"
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

"THANKS A LOT"
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"

test your normality!!

2006-05-25T21:11:00.000+08:00

It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at yourself from time to time. This little test should get you started.During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director which is the criteria that defines a patient to be institutionalized."Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask the patient to empty the bathtub."

Okay, here's your test: (Those with an abnomal tendency will scroll to the bottom to get the answer before taking the test.)

1. Would you use the spoon??
2. Would you use the teacup??
3. Would you use the bucket??

"Oh, I understand," said the visitory. "A normal person would choose the bucket since it is larger than the teacup or spoon.""No," answered the Director. "A normal person would pull the plug."So how did you do?

world's easiest quiz

2006-05-25T21:03:00.000+08:00

World's easiest quiz.
Passing requires only 4 correct answers....a measly 40%.
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific is named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
8) What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

All done? Check your answersbelow!
Scroll Down

ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific is named after what animal?
Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name?
Albert
8) What color is a purple finch?
Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Orange, of course.

Is Your Daddy Home??

2006-05-25T20:44:00.000+08:00

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered on the first ring, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?". "Yes.", whispered the small voice. May I talk with him?", the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?". "Yes.", came the answer. "May I talk with her?". Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?", the boss asked the child.
"Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman." Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?".
"No, he's busy.", whispered the child. "Busy doing what?", asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman.", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?".
"A hello-copper.", answered the whispering voice. "What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed. In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle,
"They're looking for me!"

ACTUAL BUMPER STICKERS from the Psychological Realm......

2006-05-25T20:41:00.000+08:00

"Out of my mind. Back in five minutes."
"Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot."
"Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let him sleep"
"It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you."
"I took an IQ test and the results were negative."
"Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear."
"Give me ambiguity or give me something else."
"He who laughs last, thinks slowest"
"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."
"Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies."
"Consciousness: that annoying time between naps."
"Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home."
"3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't."
"Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?"
"Have you drugged your kids today?"
"You're just jealous because the voices talk to me."
"I do what the voices in my head tell me to do."
"Just because everyone's out to get me doesn't mean I'm paranoid."
"I'm not paranoid, it's just that the world's out to get me."
"Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not after you."

TOP 10 SIGNS THAT YOU KNOW IT'S TIME TO JOIN E-MAILERS ANONYMOUS

2006-05-25T20:38:00.000+08:00

10. You wake up at 3a.m. to go to the bathroom, and check your email on the way back to bed.
9. Your firstborn is named dotcom.
8. You turn off your modem and are suddenly filled with a feeling of emptiness, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
7. You spend half of a plane trip with your laptop in your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.
6. You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access.
5. You find yourself typing "com" after every period.com
4. You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
3. You move into a new home and decide to netscape before you landscape.
2. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
DRUM ROLL PLEASEAND THE NO. 1 SIGN THAT YOU KNOW IT'S TIME TO JOIN E-MAILERS ANONYMOUS:
1. Immediately after reading this list, you post it on your blog.:)

funny proverbs- kids sayings

2006-05-25T20:35:00.000+08:00

A first grade teacher collected old, well known proverbs. She gave each kid in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up with the rest. These are great:
As You Shall Make Your Bed So Shall You... Mess It Up.
Better Be Safe Than... Punch A 5th Grader.
Strike While The... Bug Is Close.
It's Always Darkest Before... Daylight Savings Time.
Never Under Estimate The Power Of... Termites.
You Can Lead A Horse To Water But.. How?
Don't Bite The Hand That... Looks Dirty.
No News Is... Impossible.
A Miss Is As Good As A... Mr.
You Can't Teach An Old Dog New... Math.
If You Lie Down With The Dogs, You'll... Stink In The Morning.
Love All, Trust.. Me
The Pen Is Mightier Than The... Pigs.
An Idle Mind Is... The Best Way To Relax.
Where There's Smoke, There's... Pollution.
Happy The Bride Who... Gets All The Presents!
A Penny Saved Is... Not Much.
Two's Company, Three's... The Musketeers.
Don't Put Off Tomorrow What... You Put On To Go To Bed.
Laugh And The Whole World Laughs With You, Cry And... You Have To Blow Your Nose. Children Should Be Seen And Not... Spanked Or Grounded.
If At First You Don't Succeed... Get New Batteries.
You Get Out Of Something What You... See Pictured On The Box.
When The Blind Leadeth The Blind... Get Out Of The Way.
There Is No Fool Like... Aunt Eddie.

u want to know somehting really really funny?

2006-05-25T20:25:00.000+08:00

go to yahoo and type out funny stuff.
from the results, you get on top other searches.
click 'really funny stuff'
on that page, click the further search for 'really really funny stuff'
this goes oonnnn.. and onnnn.. see how long it lasts:D
good luck:D

Funny shit!

2006-05-19T18:46:00.000+08:00

I'm in a rush now!! gtg leave my place to go have fondue and bbq at my aunts place... just thot i;d leave u all with a lil laugh!

Click on this!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plSfKHZZwZ4&search=Japanese%20english%20lesson

trivia

2006-05-16T23:02:00.000+08:00

I don't know how true some of these are, but I don't think that's the point. Isn't it really handy to have something witty to say when the conversation is dragging? For instance, if someone sneezes, you will now be able to tell them that water just came screaming out of their mouth at 60mph instead of giving them the boring old "Gesundheit!" What more could you ask for?

1. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes...when you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. That's where the phrase, "good night, sleep tight" came from.
2. The term "the whole 9 yards" came from W.W.II fighter pilots in the Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "the whole 9 yards."
3. The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle, GP
4. The first toilet ever seen on television was on "Leave It To Beaver."
5. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
6. The world's termites outweigh the world's humans 10 to 1.
7. On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year, so be careful.
8. One of the longest one-syllable words in the English language is screeched. (Strengths is another one.)
9. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver or purple.
10. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".
11. The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.
12. Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.
13. There are only four words in the English language which end in "-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
14. 'Stewardesses' is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.
15. Typewriter is the only ten letter word you can type on the top row of your keyboard.
16. A 10 foot tall emu was spotted walking the streets of New York in 1973, it had accidently escaped from a circus that specialized in large exotic birds. When police questioned the circus owners they responded saying "George was constipated, so we thought a run around the grounds may help him feel better" Police fined the circus 25 dollars, and 5 months later a bi-law was passed stating that all emus within New York City must be on a leash.
17. Things that are Canadian, or invented by Canadians: Mike Myers, Michael J. Fox, Jim Carey, Basketball, the 24 time zone divisions, Hockey, Apple Pie and the reason the Whitehouse is white. The Canadians burned the capital to the ground, and the US repainted it. 18. 65% of statistics are made up.
19. More people are killed annually by donkeys than in airplane crashes.
20. If Barbie were life size her measurements would be 39-23-33
21. A duck's quack does echo, despite rumors to the contrary. 1 2 3
22. Pinocchio is Italian for pine eye (Pino is Italian for pine, Occhio is Italian for eye)
23. Camels milk doesn't curdle.
24. Murpheys oil soap is a chemical commonly used to wash elephants.
25. Porcupines float in water.
26. Cats urine glows under a black light.
27. Blueberry jelly beans were especially made for Ronald Reagan.
28. In every episode of Seinfeld there's a superman somewhere.
29. Checkmate comes from the Persian phrase "shah mat" which means the king is dead.
30. Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds while dogs have only ten.
31. 91% of Americans lie daily.
32. "two plus eleven" and "one plus twelve" not only give the same result but use the same letters
33. With lunchables you have 50% less crackers then toppings. To use them all with no left overs you would have to do two toppings per cracker.
34. When you sneeze water can come out of your mouth at speeds of 60mph.
35. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite
36. On a Canadian 2 dollar bill the flag flying over the parliament building appears to be an American flag. It's actually Canada's earlier flag of the Red Ensign.
37. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated
38. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar
39. Almonds are a member of the peach family
40. There are 366 dimples on a regulation golf ball
41. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge
42. "Angry" and "hungry" are the only words in the English language ending in "-gry" (although gry is a word, it does not *end* in -gry, since a suffix requires the word before it to be a word) 43. Sloths are actually fast, they just prefer to move at a slow pace
44. There are only two families who produced a father and son who were US presidents: Bush and Adams.
45. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes
46. Humans and horses are the only two animals that have hymens
47. Polish is the only word in the english language that has two completely different meanings when the first letter is capitalized.
48. The longest word in the English language is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcaniccounioisis
49. Margaret Kerry was the live action model for Walt Disney's Tinkerbell.
50. 111,111,111 * 111,111,111 = 12345678987654321
51. The average human lies at least twice a day.
52. Before Late Night Television, Jay Leno appeared in an episode of Laverne and Shirley.
53. In "American Graffiti", the license plate on Richard Dreyfusses' car is changed every time you see it.
54. Humans, dolphins and apes are the only mammals that have sex for pleasure.
55. The shortest 5 syllable word in the english language is ideology.
56. "I am" is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
57. The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses.
58. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
59. There are more chickens than people in the world.
60. Two thirds of the world's eggplants are grown in New Jersey.
61. All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.
62. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
63. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
64. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
65. Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
66. The only real people to be heads on a Pez dispenser are Betsy Ross, Daniel Boone and Paul Revere (source).
67. When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play football at home, the stadium becomes the state's third largest city.
68. The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life"
69. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.
70. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
71. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
72. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.
73. Who's that playing the piano on the "Mad About You" theme? Paul Reiser himself.
74. In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak during a debate.
75. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
76. Mr. Rogers was an ordained minister.
77. John Lennon's first girlfriend was named Thelma Pickles.
78. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
79. "Underground" is the only word in the English language that begins and ends with the letters "und."
80. The combination "ough" can be pronounced in ten different ways. The following sentence contains them all: "A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman swam through the lough at Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed."
81. The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.
82. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
83. Facetious, abstemious and arsenious contain all the vowels in the correct order.
84. The sloth's metabolism is so slow that it can stay under water for more than 30 minutes and not drown.
85. Spanish moss is a close relative of the pineapple.
86. "A quick sly fox jumped over the lazy brown dog" has every letter in the alphabet. So does "The five boxing wizards jump quickly."
87. 'Cash Lost In 'Em' is an anagram of 'Slot Machines'
88. Horses can't throw up (Explanation)
89. A turkey can drown if it looks up while it's raining.
90. The term "Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass mokey" started when sailors in the navy witnessed the stack of cannon balls tumble off a steel plate called a brass monkey in winters on the oceans.
91. The electric door bell was invented by Joseph Henry in 1831.
92. The wingspan of a Boeing 747 (~ 213 feet) is longer than the Wright brothers' first flight (~ 120 feet).
93. Alexander Graham Bell refused to have a phone in his study - the ringing drove him nuts. 94. Hostess Twinkies are 68% air.
95. Time Magazine's "Man" of the Year in 1982: The Personal Computer.
96. Lewis Carroll wrote Alice's Adventures in Wonderland standing up.
97. The smallest unit of time is the yoctosecond, which is .000,000,000,000,000,000,000,001 second.
98. Elvis had a pet monkey named Scatter.
99. The average adult has 5 million hair follicles.
100. Only female ducks quack. The males coo, hoto, honk and grunt, but they don't quack.
101. Pumice is the only rock that floats.
102. 20% of all publications sold in Japan are comic books.
103. The average American consumes 87 hot dogs a year.
104. The tallest mountain on earth is not Mt. Everest, it's Hawaii's Mauna Kea, 31,800 feet from the ocean floor.
105. The right rear tire on your car will generally wear out before the others do.
106. Superglue will not stick to Teflon.
107. Insects outnumber people 1 million to one.
108. After spending 84 days in Skylab, astronauts found that they were 2 inches taller.
109. Enter the value 0.1134 on your calculator, then turn it upside down. You've just written "hello."
110. There is 1 slot machine in Las Vegas for every 8 inhabitants.
111. Every year, 5,000 people injure themselves shooting pool.
112. 80% of all life on Earth is found in the ocean.
113. Sneakers were invented in 1917. They were called Keds.
114. A survey of people's greatest fears had the following results: 1) Heights, 2) Snakes, 3) Spiders, 4) Public speaking.
115. The average IQ of police officers is 104.
116. Timothy Leary was the godfather of actresses Uma Thurman and Winona Ryder.
117. All of your body's functions, even your heart, stop when you sneeze.
118. The average American family spends more on taxes than on food, clothing and shelter combined.
119. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of where they grew up.
120. In almost every language on earth, the word for Mother begins with the letter 'M'.
121. If you counted 100 stars a minute, it would take 2,000 years to count all the stars in our galaxy.
122. Every day, 1 acre of trees produces enough oxygen for 18 people.
123. If Earth were the size of an apple, its atmosphere would be thinner than the skin.
124. Before Columbus arrived in the Americas, no native american had type B blood.
125. Pintos and Palominos are colors, not breeds, of horses.
126. An adult takes an average of 16 breaths a minute.
127. The best-selling passenger car ever was the VW Beetle. At least 22 million have been sold since 1937.
128. How long is a million seconds? 11.5 days.
129. A french kiss is known as an english kiss in France.
130. What do Albert Einstein, Tom Cruise and Walt Disney have in common? Dyslexia.
131. Scientists say the easiest sound for the human ear to hear is "Ah."
132. When Astronauts returned from the moon, they had to go through customs.
133. The average adult laughs 7 to 8 times a day.
134. Elephants are the only mammals that can't jump.
135. It takes 7 shuffles to thoroughly mix a 52-card deck.
136. The index finger on the Statue of Liberty is 8 feet long.
137. The 7 deadly sins are: Pride, envy, wrath, sloth, avarice, gluttony, lust.
138. The 7 virtues are: Faith, hope, charity, fortitude, prudence, justice, temperance.
139. The 7 dwarfs are: Dopey, Sneezy, Bashful, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, Doc.
140. The 7 seas are: Red, Adriatic, Black, Caspian, Mediterranean, Persian Gulf, Indian Ocean. 141. Napoleon was not short as many people think. He was in fact 5 foot 6 1/2 inches, which is slightly taller than the average French man at the time. The cause of the confusion was that in his autopsy it was said he was 5 foot 2 inches, but that was in French feet.1
142. The top speed of a racing pigeon in flight is 110mph.
143. A bison can jump as high as 6 feet off the ground.
144. It's impossible for most people to lick their elbow (try it).
145. A human yell would take 3 1/2 hours to travel from New York to San Francisco.
146. Princeton professor John W. Tukey coined the term "software" in 1958.
147. The average cost of a movie in 1940 was 24¢
148. Aristotle stuttered.

why its great to be a guy

2006-05-16T22:53:00.000+08:00

1. Your last name stays put.
2. The garage is all yours.
3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
4. Chocolate is just another snack.
5. You can be president.
6. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
8. You don't give a rats hindquarters whether or not someone notices your new haircut.
9. The world is your urinal.
10. You never have to drive to another gas station because "this one is just too icky."
11. Same work, more pay.
12. Wrinkles add character.
13. Wedding Dress, $5,000; Tux Rental, $100.
14. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
15. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
16. One mood, ALL the time.
17. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
18. You know stuff about tanks.
19. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
20. You can open all your own jars.
21. You can leave the motel bed unmade.
22. You can kill your own food.
23. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
24. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
25. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
26. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.
27. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
28. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at me."
29. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
30. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
31. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
32. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
33. You almost never have strap problems in public.
34. You don't mind wrinkles in your clothes.
35. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
36. You don't have to shave below your neck.
37. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
38. You can do your nails with a pocket knife.
39. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
40. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives on December 24th, in 30 minutes. 41. You can pack for a trip in less than a half hour.
42. Your hair is dry after taking a shower by the time you're dressed.
43. Facial hair is a good thing.
44. You can go to the bathroom without a support group
45. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry.
46. You can write your name in the snow.
47. You can take your shirt off on a hot day.
48. You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing.
49. Gray hair adds character.
50. With 400 million sperm per go, you could double the earth's population in 15 tries, in theory. 51. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
52. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.
53. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
54. Bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
55. You don't care if the toilet seat is left up.
56. One acronym that doesn't pertain - PMS.
57. You don't have to wear makeup.
58. You can think about girls all the time and it's alright.
59. You can lean down to pick something up without having to worry about your shirt hanging open.
60. You don't get pregnant.
61. You don't take hours and hours to get ready.
62. You don't secretly resent friends who are more attractive.
63. You don't care if you look like crap when your picture is taken.
64. Homer Simpson makes perfect sense.
65. You don't have to worry about breaking a nail.
66. Complaints about something being to heavy are kept to yourself.
67. Your eyes can remain open when you step on the scale.
68. You can take pride in breaking wind.
69. A shower only takes a few minutes and the drain doesn't get clogged with hair.
70. No stretch marks.
71. Beauty and the Beast (average guys can get hot girls).
72. You don't go around asking your buddies whether the pants you're wearing make your butt look big.
73. You get praise for doing things around the house once in a while.
74. A hair cut costs less than $20
75. Three shirts and two pairs of pants are enough clothes for a month.

2006-05-16T22:31:00.000+08:00

Hopefully you've never had these used on you, but this is a list of excuses to use if that "special" someone asks you out and you don't know how to say no. If someone gives you one of these excuses, it is very likely that they have absolutely no interest in going out with you.

1. I have to floss my cat.
2. I've dedicated my life to linguini.
3. I want to spend more time with my blender.
4. The President said he might drop in.
5. The man on television told me to say tuned.
6. I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.
7. I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.
8. It's my parakeet's bowling night.
9. It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.
10. I'm building a pig from a kit.
11. I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it.
12. I'm enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.
13. There's a disturbance in the Force.
14. I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.
15. I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted.
16. I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.
17. I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.
18. I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.
19. I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
20. My crayons all melted together.
21. I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.
22. I'm in training to be a household pest.
23. I'm getting my overalls overhauled.
24. My patent is pending.
25. I'm attending the opening of my garage door.
26. I'm sandblasting my oven.
27. I'm worried about my vertical hold.
28. I'm going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.
29. I'm being deported.
30. The grunion are running.
31. I'll be looking for a parking space.
32. My Millard Filmore Fan Club meets then.
33. The monsters haven't turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots.
34. I'm taking punk totem pole carving. 3
5. I have to fluff my shower cap.
36. I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.
37. I've come down with a really horrible case of something or other.
38. I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.
39. My plot to take over the world is thickening.
40. I have to fulfill my potential.
41. I don't want to leave my comfort zone.
42. It's too close to the turn of the century.
43. I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.
44. My subconscious says no.
45. I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.
46. I left my body in my other clothes.
47. The last time I went out, I never came back.
48. I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.
49. I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
50. None of my socks match.
51. I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.
52. I'm having all my plants neutered.
53. People are blaming me for the Spanish-American War.
54. I changed the lock on my door and now I can't get out.
55. I'm making a home movie called "The Thing That Grew in My Refrigerator."
56. I'm attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.
57. My yucca plant is feeling yucky.
58. I'm touring China with a wok band.
59. My chocolate-appreciation class meets that night.
60. I never go out on days that end in "Y."
61. My mother would never let me hear the end of it.
62. I'm running off to Yugoslavia with a foreign-exchange student named Basil Metabolism.
63. I just picked up a book called "Glue in Many Lands" and I can't put it down.
64. I'm too old/young for that stuff.
65. I have to ash/condition/perm/curl/tease my hair.
66. I have too much guilt.
67. There are important world issues that need worrying about.
68. I have to draw "Cubby" for an art scholarship.
69. I'm uncomfortable when I'm alone or with others.
70. I promised to help a friend fold road maps.
71. I feel a song coming on.
72. I'm trying to be less popular.
73. My bathroom tiles need grouting.
74. I have to bleach my hare.
75. I'm waiting to see if I'm already a winner.
76. I'm writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.
77. You know how we psychos are.
78. My favorite commercial is on TV.
79. I have to study for a blood test.
80. I'm going to be old someday.
81. I've been traded to Cincinnati.
82. I'm observing National Apathy Week.
83. I have to rotate my crops.
84. My uncle escaped again.
85. I'm up to my elbows in waxy buildup.
86. I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.
87. I'm having my baby shoes bronzed.
88. I have to go to court for kitty littering.
89. I'm going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.
90. I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.
91. Having fun gives me prickly heat.
92. I'm going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is looking for me.
93. I have to jog my memory.
94. My palm reader advised against it.
95. My Dress For Obscurity class meets then.
96. I have to stay home and see if I snore.
97. I prefer to remain an enigma.
98. I think you want the OTHER [your name].
99. I have to sit up with a sick ant.
100. I'm trying to cut down.
101. My asthma is acting up again
102. That would interfere with my time to wait for the government to take me away.
103. You're ugly, I'm busy, have a nice day
104. Its my goldfish's birthday
105. Uh, I have stuff to do.
106. I have to make an air sandwich
107. I have to hide the bodies.
108. I don't have time to go on a date...with YOU!
109. I have to wash my hair.
110. I have to clean my toilet
111. I need to spend quality time with my weed wacker
112. I need to clean the air in my room
113. My hamster is having a heart transplant and I need to stay for moral support.
114. I caught a rare deadly African disease that's highly contagious.
115. My gerbil is getting married.
116. I have plans to clean the cracks in my floor
117. Sorry, when you came to my door I mistook you for a mormon and took cover.
118. I had to rob your house
119. That's the night I reorganize my rock collection.
120. Pinnochio is on tonight
121. I have to try out for the ice skating team at school.
122. I don't date outside my species
123. Sorry I think I'm gay
124. I have to go...........over..............there.
125. My butt is to big in this dress
126. I have to take out the trash
127. My dog had baby kittens.
128. I can't, I need to take my computer apart and put it back together.
129. I have to go shopping for my mother.
130. I'm sorry, I have to rotate the strings on all of my shoes.
131. No
132. I told my car I would tenderly rub wax into it's body
133. I have to go for my full body wax appointment
134. I can't I was asked to go to another party w/o you
135. I don't date goats!
136. Ally Mcbeal is on
137. I'm reading with my widower
138. I have to brush my teeth.
139. Alf comes on soon
140. I'm sick.
141. I've had a better offer, some bloke is coming round to set fire to my head
142. I'm busy cleaning the blood off my axe
143. My dad said I can't date till I am married
144. I'm shaving my dog.
145. It's against my religion to date people named (insert relevant name)
146. My grandma is on fire.
147. I'm getting married tonight.
148. I'm engaged.
149. I don't want to ruin our friendship.
150. I have family in town.
151. I just washed my hair.
152. It's that time of the month again.
153. My father's grandmother's aunt's mother died.
154. I have to take down the Christmas lights.
155. I have to go to a surprise party for my grandma's birthday.
156. I left my tolerance in another coat.
157. I just got back together with my ex
158. I don't like people.
159. I have to alphabetize my CDs. (Hey, is that supposed to be insulting to me? -- dan)
160. I might see someone who knows me.
161. My brother's sister's mum's son's dad died.
162. I would, but it would be a complete waste of make-up.
163. My pet snake is constipated again.
164. I have a phobia of people named (insert name here).
165. I have to teach my pig to sing.
166. I just got sick (right after you asked me out).
167. My dog is too tired.
168. I never said I'd go out with you, that was my evil twin.
169. I would go out with you but my waiting list is full.
170. There's a four hour TV special on trimming shrubbery.
171. I'm washing the sofa.
172. I have to milk my cow.
173. Everquest.
174. I don't want to miss Martha Stewart's premiere.
175. I have to teach my frog how to croak.
176. I'm too busy watching the paint dry.
177. The "Rocky" marathon is on that night.
178. I promised my mum I'd bathe the hamster.
179. I tripped over an ant and broke my leg.
180. I need to clip my nose hairs.
181. I have to read the labels on all of my food.
182. You are extremely unattractive. Sorry, someone had to tell you.
183. I'm gay.
184. I don't like you.
185. My goat broke a horn.
186. I have to go to the dentist.
187. I have to brush my dog's teeth.
188. I must go in search of my charms which were stolen by an angry leprechaun.
189. I'm going to the moon.
190. My water wings are flat.
191. I have to stay home and give my goldfish a bath.
192. I'm going to be playing with my mental blocks.
193. I have to wax the driveway.
194. I'm not into dating right now.
195. I'm teaching my goldfish how to play the electric guitar.
196. I'm teaching my dog to meow.
197. I have to watch Oprah.
198. I like you, but my friends said I can't go out with you.
199. I like your best friend.
200. I'm complicated to go out with.
201. I just found out we're related.
202. On my list of things to do, seeing you is at the bottom.

20 ways to maintain ur insanity

2006-05-16T22:24:00.000+08:00

* by the way this was GOING to be on MY (douGH) blog.. but im sacrificing it.. for dear darcy.. bleah.

20 WAYS TO MAINTAIN YOUR INSANITY:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors"
7. Finish All Your Sentences With; "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Don't Use Any Punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend their Party because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You by Your Wrestling Name, Rock-Hard.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......
20. spread the message around to visit my blog!!!!!

2006-05-15T17:03:00.000+08:00

HALLO DARYL CHEE ANNE AMELIA AND DOUGH WANT TO GO FOR LECTURE

THE FOLLOWING BLOGPOST IS POSTED BY ANNE MELIA DOUGH AND DARYL CHEE[ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh].
OKAY LETS START

-milli
EYE MEEEESH EEEEWWWW ANNEEEEEEEE

-n
hallo
basically im doing this cos i havent got any bloody thing to blog abt cos bobby didnt take any photos for the damn trip.
okie dokes.

-dough
life is wierd.when u least expect it, one day you wake up and realise that all the pillars in teh world are after you. actually not just u but evry damn human on earth. when u least expect it, they are out to get you. how? very simple... when ur not looking, they pop about the corner and u smack rite into them...

-anne-
i walk a lonely road. jang jang. the only one that i have ever know. jang jangjnatg

-n
hahAH. thats not me. shit theres no exclamation mark%Q
amelia. stop biting me. and dough, where have the penguins gone? AMELIA IS ATTTACCKKKING MEEEEEEEEE DAMNIT
i like big butts and i cannot lie
i want

-milli
we believe in one God, the father the almighty.

-dough
anne wants a c ertain person.... orchard? no.. she wants MEEEEE. dough.. why? cos she missed me {exclamation mark} she said so herself so.. HAHA SUCKERS yeah. me MOI THE WORLDS GREATEST{exclamation mark} not U oh great orchard. but ME MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

-milli
on the third day, he rose again in fulfilment of the scriptures.

-n
THIS JUST IN [im ignoring the blonde dough.]

-dough
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo

-n[interrupts]
MOUNT MERAPI ERUPTS[EXCLAMATION MARK]
oh my lordy

-milli
we look for the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come AMEN.

-dough
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARK TANG[EXCLAMATION MARK] HEY COOL uve got the same name as teh exclamation mark.hahaha. yeah. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. tho it was last week. I KNOW . u know why? cos it was my bdae toooOOOOO[exclamation mark] muahahahaha. rock on who ever you are mark. never met yuou but u rock anyhow cos ur annes FREND[EXCLAMATION MARK]

-n

-milli
benedictatu in mulieribus e benedictus

-dough
ahahhaa n didnt say anything cos she got BLANKED

-n
i miss you dude
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
aeh5qbh5y=bq56uqpnu

-dough
orchard road. orchard boulevard... hahahahahha orchard orchard.. dude orchard.. WILLIE ORCHARD

-milli
wait wait wait are u SURE dude directly refers to shoppin guy? anyway..ora pronobis peccatoribus.

-darcy
William's daddy's name is [removed][Exclaimation mark] Btw.. ask dough for the rubber.

-milli
but be smart abt it..must ration..cos she only got one.

-n
the virgin Mary is my role model.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

-dough
yeah but she still had a kid eh?...

-n
i uh...i shall CHANGE THE SUBJECT[EXCLMATION MARK]
DARYL CHEE IS SHORT.
BUT OTHER DUDES ARE TALLER[EXCLMATION MARK]
ahhhhhhhhhhhhahahaha.

-Darcy
Sureeeeeeeeee... my height is short.. but we havent talked about length.

-n
how does it feel like to have a dick?

-milli
how odd a questionn.

-n
WHAT?[EXCLMATION MARK] i havent seen one before so i ask LAH[EXCLMATION MARK]

-Darcy
Maybe not yet.. but i reckon u will soon heheheheh.

-Darcy
And to answer the previous question... it feels great [Smiley] imagine a world without ever waiting to use the toilet.

-n
i should get a dick implant

-milli
i thot theres sth abt all foetuses are born with one.

-dough
maybe.. but it is scientifically proven taht each year a guy lives the girl chromosones in a guy increases and if a guy lives long enuf he will turn into a girl.. so good bye to the dicks..

-n
how much does a dick cost?

-milli
wait dough..u mean it shortens then disappears?

-Darcy
Answering anne's question... hahaha how much does a dick cost??? For u? i'm free

-n
when are you free?

-Darcy
For you? anytime [cheeko smile] Whaddya think now aye willy??

-dough
u know we should check up on darcy maybe his is disappearing...

-n
i help to check?
and im free now until the ltc meeting
so you wanna go now?
im meeting orchard only after that so i have time

-Darcy
Just name the place.... baaabbbaaaeeee... let me go put on my costume

-n
costume? i like costumes[EXCLMATION MARK]

-milli
do they involve handcuffs?
cos then im interested.

-Darcy
Hmmm i think i've got a spare police uniform for you.. it may be a lil tight down there tho.

-n
melia go away lah.

-milli
tight? squash abit nvm la..its disappearing anw rite?

-n
i cant wait[EXCLMATION MARK] what about you dough?

-dough
im am NOT coming.. u can count me out unless u want pics.. i dont mind being the photographer...

-Darcy
Regarding the disappearing thing... its just a lil shy sometimes

-n
dude i dont mind. how???? time's running out[EXCLMATION MARK] ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh duuuuuuudddde hurry up lah.

-Darcy
Don't go for the ltc briefing.. come to my lecture.. i'm the lecturer.. and you're the attentive student.. pay attention or i'll have to punish you[EXCLMATION MARK]

-dough
oooo scary.... tahts sick man.. then again the whole thing is sick.....yewh.. uck...

-n
dude? where are you????????????[EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK] heeeeeeeeeelllllllllp

-Darcy
K lah... i nots appreciated.. ok lor.. DONT WANT, DONE[EXCLMATION MARK]

-n
whoops. ive hurt daryl B chee's feelings. awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. no lah no lah you not so small okay? i help you confirm later. and i pay attention in your lecture lah.

-dough
not short... just lacking in length.. hehehe...

-n
HALLO XIAO AN[EXCLMATION MARK]

-xiao an
hi. you know, i'm not supposed to be here right now.

-n
okay byebye dude.
HALLLO DARCY[EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK] do you still feel small?

-dough
or just lacking in length..???

-Darcy
Why dont u take the darcy special tour? THen you'll see what the word 'big' really really meansssss

-n
okay im going first[EXCLMATION MARK]
melia you wanna go next? what abt the blonde dough?

-dough
eh damn dont go for the lect thingy.. ur gonna leave me all ALONEEEEEEEE.[EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK][EXCLMATION MARK]

-n
okay let's go
byebye melia
byebye dough
byebye xiao an
byebye dough
byebye DARRRRRRCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE let's go for lect now[EXCLMATION MARK]

-Darcy
I've got lots to teach u young ones [Cheeky smile]

-n
okay byebye.

stop global warming
save the walruses

Orange WAS the colour.

2006-05-11T22:37:00.000+08:00

Ah i guess i was wrong abt the previous post.. turns out the t38 i used to know was a dream, its now made up of like 10 pple? God knows. Not that i care anymore anyhow. I laid out my class jersey a week ago.. wore it around the house a couple of times.. didnt wanna use it for soccer on sunday.. then today came. First thing i did in the morning was get myself pumped up for the exciting day ahead.. i wore my jersey with pride and i took the bus to CCAB. What happened when i got there? I struggled to find my class cos i was a lil late... i knew i'd spot them a mile away because of our distinct orange jerseys but there were nowhere to be found. When i finally made it to the otherside of the grandstand where i assumed tey would be (they were), i only saw another person in an orange shirt- Tina. The other people in the area, were all wearing blue shirts.. they looked very very familiar.. alas.. my classmates. Everyone else was dressed up in their class colours.. save for mine. True.. we agreed to come in PE shirt for the morning assembly then change after that but guess what... half of them didnt bring the damn shirt. Honestly.. whats the bloody point in buying it then... on the only school day u get to wear it.. u dont bring it.. its common sense. There were complaints last year when we purchased the jerseys cos pple felt that its a waste of money buyin sth they'll hardly ever use... well hello.. that was your complaint.. not mine, i brought and wore my damn shirt. Never the matter... it gets worse... the people who can play sports and give us that competitive edge.. preferred to go for an eco challenge and take tonnes of pictures!! yay!.. its not that easy either.. but honestly.. my class.. at least to me.. shrank today.. god bless those who actually bothered to wear the shirt.. sth that has lost all symbolic meaning to me.. now its just another shirt.
maybe this is all childish and wrong but its the way i feel.. at least now.. imagine being so enthu abt sth.. believing in sth soo much and have it thrown in your face.. Disappointment above all else... well.. whatever happened last year.. was probably a dream.. but it was a good dream. Here's a picture.. one last time.. of what used to be T38 to me.

God bless, The 31st Student Council.

Orange is the colour.

2006-05-08T21:36:00.000+08:00

This post is dedicated to my beloved class, who have made my life in CJC as perfect as it can possibly be.

To all potential competetors this thursay, pay close attention.

"Remember a time when a tide of orange came crashing down on you. Remember the fear u felt when it came charging at u inexorably. Remember how u trembled on the very ground that was not yours. Remember all these for soon it shall happen... again. Remember the titans, remember TeeThirtyEight." -Daryl B. Chee, 369 B.C

"Repent and retreat now for certain defeat lies ahead of you." -Unfriendly man

"Sports is a war without weapons" -Some random GP essay question

"Love your team, love the supporters and most importantly, love the game." -Darcy.

So for all u challengers... heres a sneak preview of our class spirit.

god bless the workers party

2006-05-07T11:14:00.000+08:00

Thanks soo much ado for keeping my blog alive.. but i think its time i update u with whats been up in my life. I've always thot that pictures speak a 1000 words, so aft this entry is thru.. it should come up to 10000 words at leat ;) This post is about my life.. thru my eyes.. what u see is what i see.. if only my eyes had an in built camera.. enjoy!

2006-05-01T20:51:00.000+08:00

the rejected names for viagra

2006-04-30T22:52:00.000+08:00

Erectocin
Rigitonin
Tricoxicin
Tetrapenisin
Prictaphin
Yangerphrin
Dorkadrine
Bonerphrene
Bangitrol
Apetermenophine
Stiffinactin
Maxidongisin
Hardonicyclin
Throbocine
Membernephrin
Longdongicillin
Wienermide
Peckermycin

mom-isms. things your mom always says

2006-04-30T14:12:00.000+08:00

A little "birdy" told me!

All I do is follow you around, picking up after you like some maid.

Am I talking to a brick wall?

Are you deaf or something?

Are you lying to me?

As long as you live under my roof, you'll do as I say.

Beds are NOT made for jumping on.

Call me when you get there, just so I know you're okay.

Close the door! You don't live in a barn.

Did you brush your teeth?

Did you comb your hair?

Do as I say, not as I do.

Do you think I'm made of money?

Do you think your socks are going to pick themselves up?

Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back.

Don't eat that, you'll get worms!

Don't go out with a wet head, you'll catch cold.

Don't make me get up!

Don't pick that scab, it'll get infected.

Don't pick your nose in public.

Don't run in the house.

Don't sit too close to the television, it'll ruin your eyes.

Don't talk with your mouth full!

Don't walk away when I'm talking to you!

Eat your vegetables, they're good for you.

Enough is enough!

Go play outside! It's a beautiful day!

Going to a party? Leave a phone number in case I need to call.

Going to a party? Who's going to be there?

Going to a party? Will the parents be home?

How do you know you don't like it if you haven't tasted it?

I brought you into this world, and I can take you right back out!

I can't believe you can sleep in this filth!

I didn't ask who put it there, I said "Pick it up!"

I don't care what "everyone" is doing. I care what YOU are doing!

I don't have to explain myself. I said no.

I hope someday you have children just like you.

I just want what's best for you.

I will always love you - no matter what.

If God had wanted you to have holes in your ears (eyebrows, tongue, etc.) He would have put them there!

If it were a snake, it would have bitten you.

If wishes were horses...

If you could stay out last night, you can get up this morning.

If you don't do it NOW, then when are you going to do it?

If you stick your tongue out again it will fall off.

If you're too sick to go to school, you're too sick to play outside.

I'm doing this for your own good.

I'm going to skin you alive!

I'm not going to ask you again.

I'm not your cleaning lady!

I'm not your waitress!

Isn't it past your bedtime?

It's not that I don't trust you, it's that I don't trust everyone else.

Life isn't fair.

Look at me when I'm talking to you.

Money does NOT grow on trees.

No child of MINE would do something like that.

Nobody asked you.

Over my dead body!

Pick that up before somebody trips on it and breaks their neck!

Pick up your feet.

Put that down! You don't know where it's been!

Say that again and I'll wash your mouth out with soap.

Shut the door! I'm not heating (air conditioning) the entire neighborhood!

Shut your mouth and eat.

So it's raining? You're not sugar -- you won't melt.

So what if Bob's mom let him do it? If Bob's mom let him jump off the Empire State Building, would you want me to let you do it too?

Someone is going to end up crying.

There's enough dirt in those ears to grow potatoes!

This hurts me more than it hurts you.

Turn that racket (music) down!

Watch your mouth!
Well, I haven't figured out how to cook "cold" yet.

Well, people in Hell want ice water too!

What did I say the FIRST time?

What if everyone jumped off a cliff? Would you do it, too?

What part of NO don't you understand?

When I was a little girl...

When I was young we had respect for our elders, now look at the world!

When I was your age, I had to walk ten miles through the snow, uphill, by myself, to go to school.

When will you be back?

When you have your own house then you can make the rules!

Where do YOU think you're going?

Who died and left you boss?

Who do you think you're talking to?

Who taught you THAT? You didn't learn that in this house!

Wipe your feet!

You can't find it? Well, I can't find it for you - I didn't wear it!

You can't find it? Well, I can't find it for you - I'm not the maid!

You can't find it? Well, if you'd put things where they belonged, you wouldn't have this problem.

You can't find it? Well, where did you leave it last?

You can't start the day on an empty stomach.

You don't always get what you want. It's a hard lesson, but you might as well learn it now.

You have an answer for everything, don't you?

You kids are trying to drive me crazy!

You must think rules are made to be broken.

You won't be happy until you break that, will you?

You'll understand when you're older.

A little soap & water never killed anybody.

Always wear clean underwear in case you get in an accident.

Answer me when I ask you a question!

Are you going out dressed like that?

Are your hands broken? Pick it up yourself! I'm not your maid!

Be good.

Bored! How can you be bored? I was never bored at your age.

Clean up after yourself!

Cupcakes are NOT a breakfast food!

Did you clean your room?

Did you flush?

Do you live to annoy me?

Do you think this is a hotel? You can't just come here only to sleep.

Don't ask me WHY. The answer is NO.

Don't cross your eyes or they'll freeze that way.

Don't EVER let me catch you doing that again!

Don't make me come in there!

Don't put that in your mouth, you don't know where it's been.

Don't run with a lollipop in your mouth.

Don't stay up too late!

Don't use that tone with me!

Don't you have anything better to do?

Go ask your father.

Go to your room and think about what you did!

How can you have nothing to wear? Your closet is FULL of clothes!

How many times do I have to tell you?

I can always tell when you're lying.

I can't believe you did that!

I don't buy snacks to feed the neighborhood!

I don't care who started it, I said stop!

I don't care who started it, YOU stop it!

I don't know is NOT an answer.

I hope you don't kiss me with that mouth!

I said CLOSE the door, I did not say SLAM it.

I would have never talked to MY mother like that!

If I catch you doing that one more time, I'll...

If I want your opinion I'll ask for it!

If I've told you once ... I've told you a thousand times.

If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

If you don't clean your plate, you won't get any dessert.

If you don't stop crying, I am going to give you something to cry about!

If you're too full to finish your dinner, you're too full for dessert.

I'll treat you like an adult when you start acting like one.

I'm going to give you until the count of three...

I'm not always going to be around to do these things for you.

I'm not running a taxi service.

I'm not your maid!

Is your homework finished?

It's no use crying over spilt milk.

I've had it up to here with you.

Leave your sister (brother) alone!

Little pitchers have big ears.

Look at this room! It looks like a pigsty!

Never try on anyone else's glasses or you'll go blind.

No, I don't know where your socks are, its not my day to watch them!

Now, come back downstairs and go back up WITHOUT stomping your feet!

Now, say you're sorry...and MEAN it!

Running away? Don't let the door hit you in the rear.

Running away? I'll help you pack.

Running away? Is that a threat or a promise?

Some day you will thank me for this. SMACK!!!

Someday your face will freeze like that

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Think of those poor starving children in India... (or China, or Africa.)

Turn off that light. Do you think we own the electric company?

Watch your language!

Well, people in Hades want ice water, but do you see me with a PITCHER?

Were you born in a barn? Close the door -- and DON'T slam it!

What do you think, money grows on trees?

What kind of a grade is that? You could do much better!

When did your last slave die?

When I was your age...

When you have kids of your own you'll understand.

Where are you going?

Who are you going with? Do I know them?

Who do you think you are?

Who said life was going to be easy?

Why? Because I SAID so, that's why!

You are getting on my last nerve.

You can go out to play...after you brush your teeth and comb your hair.

You can go out to play...after you pick up your room.

You can go out to play...after you've done your homework.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

You could grow potatoes in those ears!

You could have called.

You had better wipe that smile off your face before I do it for you.

You just ate an hour ago!

You made your bed, now lie in it.

You should have that phone surgically implanted in your ear.

You WILL eat it, and you WILL like it!

You'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your shoulders!

You will ALWAYS be my baby.

You're going to put your eye out with that thing!

Your father is going to hear about this when HE gets home!

You're the oldest. You should know better.

the high and mighty mr darcy

2006-04-23T15:54:00.000+08:00

this is my rendition of mr darcy from pride and prejudice. i figured that if we could share the same name maybe we can share the same expression.:)

Defend your turf!

2006-04-13T20:15:00.000+08:00

Hoho!! much better mood today.. but i'm quite solemn during this holy week. I watched the gospel of judas on the nat geo channel the other night and it introduced some doubts into my faith. But that hasnt been the only thing that has shaken my faith, the Da Vinci Code.. no matter what its critics say, is a very very good book. It is very easy to understand and it gives u a chance to think about the origins of christianity and what other things may have been censored from us. Things like the possibilty that jesus has descendants, he was married, judas iscariot was TOLD by jesus to betray him.. blah blah. Somehow.. there is a possibilty that judas iscariot did indeed betray jesus on his instructions. A gospel is essentially the good news.. but ppl say.. why would anyone want to write a gospel about the man who betrayed jesus, whose very action caused the crucifixtion and death of jesus? Well.. altho all the other gospels say that judas is a betrayer and is condemned to the lowest level of hell where he is eaten head first by lucifer himself and blah blah.. the gospel of judas.. altho is the only source of its kind, proclaiming that judas was given this task by jesus to fulfil the scriptures and that judas was the closest of all the other apostles to jesus, can be true... it can be true... If u were the ONLY person to be given this task and u were meant to carry it out no matter how dire the consequences, no matter how ur actions may bring ppl to spit at the sound of ur name... would u expect the majority of ppl to believe ur side of the story? There are always possiblities... what if what we are being told now.. everything.. the greatest story ever told was the biggest cover up of all time?

No matter... u shouldnt burden urself with the worries of religion.. if it werent for religion, man wouldnt have survived till now... if it werent for religion, science would never developed.. religion gives men morals... and morals, integrity, honor and etc is what differentiates us from an animal. The da vinci code is coming out soon and that should be a bomb!

Anw.. it is maundy thursday.. i must go church hopping now.. but earlier today at a reflection thingy.. i was praying to god and i was reflecting on how i've been treating my friends.. how i let 1 small comment/ rumour, completely change my character and make me cold towards pple.. particularly towards females.. how i mistreat chang yi, paddy, mei qi, rachel who i still owe ice cream, jared, graham and almost everyone, the people who i love the most.. who i share my joys and lameness with, all that... My work.. the whole a level shit.. thats another reason... a major reason.. But i really cant believe how the pple who i thought were my friend(s) could be so shallow and make an absolute statement like that... and they do it with a smile on their face.. which is the worst thing ever.. its like.. stabbing you in the back with a smirk on their face..well this evidently shows u that they are no friend(s) of yours.. i tried to get talks arranged to settle this problem cos i hate leaving these things hanging and i am everyone's friend.. but things broke down.. didnt even get to talk... another way i forsake my friends and all is when i dont find who they hang out with, very appealing and so my relationship with tt person deteriorates till its near non-existence. I like the phrases "together and by association / when u cant tell a man's character, look at his friends" But no! this cannot do! I'm not this sort of person.. i despise the situation and i am gonna change all that.. no way can i let some shit ass comment spoil darcy.. no no no.. I have decided there is a need for change and i will cherish my friends.. for they, well u.. if u are indeed a busybody lol.. are what makes me, me.. what is the esscence of me. It will be difficult no doubt.. but it is a transition thing.. u know.. like transition lenses? hhahah yeah.. the whole homeostatic effect.. negative feedback.. adrenocorticoid hormone.. deoxyribonucleic acid.. glycogenolysis.. gluconeogenesis... glycogenesis.. blah blah.. Anw.. this is A very rare occasion.. i never let my mind out.. i missed confession so.. ahha this is whats going on now. Ah well... the next story is about street soccer and DEFENDING YOUR TURF! Iggy, Eddie, Mark P., Pinoy, Darcy & Thad are members of team flame and hope to get a chance to compete against other teams on the 22nd of april at ngee ann city in a competition organised my nokia and the football association of sing-jia-pore. Cheers y'all!

Think abt it.

2006-04-11T21:41:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking alot lately.. more than i normally do.. been treating friends who were once close, like tarts and i've changed tremendously.. I dont know.. i get quite sensitive to what pple say cos i read body language a lot.. monotonous answers like "no, maybe, yes, how, bye" on msn or sms just the annoy the hell out of me.. why cant u show more affection in ur words.. no doubt its a virtual thing we all use to communicate with each other.. i mean just add in a haha or a :) or whatever just to pepper up the conversation and make the other person feel better. I know i'd feel better if pple did that.. not many do.. Sometimes i think hard about who my true friends are.. and i judge it based on their actions.. but i'm an overall happy person.. its only sometimes when everyone seems to be soo superficial that i get annoyed. I really wanna go for this tinggi trip at the end of this month for NYAA... but mr tan wont let me go because i have a low eq according to him.. i did piss him off.. as well.. c'est la vie. Anyway.. its got a lot to do with study as well.. the impending a level examination has already put on my fragile shoulders, a burden too heavy to bear.. But when i think abt what one teacher said to me.. i feel better. I quote him, " everyday, you are living in somebody else's dream". I will never never forget this sentence and what it means to me. I see it all the time.. maybe this abstract from a conversation i had on msn today could pump in more detail.

no im not.. but i often wonder wad life would be like if we were someone else/....

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
so do i

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
but then i look around

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
.. know that u are living in somebody else's dream

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
u always are

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
even for the simplest reasons

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
i looked at a partially blind couple in their 70s? they were using their hands and
they were trying to unzip a first aid bag and zip it up again.. just to touch and feel

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
i was soo touched and amazed

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
it took soo much effort to find the zip which we always easily locate and unzip

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
i was inspired... no matter their disability.. they make the best of it

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
then again.. i saw this poor kid in a wheelchair at the dental centre.. he's a mongoloid kid i think.. its like a horrrible version of down syndrome

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
cant talk.. cant.. anything

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
yet he is there.. before me..

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
what u have.. is someone elses dream

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
and what someone else ahs may be ur dream

darcy. freedom! forever! www.uareabusybody.blogspot.com -updated! says:
but come back down to ur level always and take a peek below u.. then perhaps we might just be satisfied

Think abt it.

Then they created a monster.

2006-04-02T21:26:00.000+08:00

* The following is an actual advertisement in an Irish Newspaper..!

* 1985 Blue Volkswagen Golf
* Only 15 km
* Only first gear and reverse used
* Never driven hard
* Original tyres
* Original brakes
* Original fuel and oil
* Only 1 driver
* Owner wishing to sell due to employment lay-off
* Photo Attached

What they did to me was monstrous

2006-03-30T22:10:00.000+08:00

Ever wondered what things would be like if England took over USA? Enjoy and thanks Ado!

Notice of Revocation of Independence, By John Cleese

To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium." Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will bereinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour', skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced 'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise." You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra' e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary." Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed." There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won't have to use bad language as often.

2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell- checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize."

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents - Scottish dramas such as "Taggart" will no longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we're talking about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is "Devon." If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English characters. British sit-coms such as "Men Behaving Badly" or "Red Dwarf" will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American "football." There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by 2005. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called "rounders," which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.

7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive Day."

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself.

12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager." The substances formerly known as "American Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Knat's Urine," with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as "Weak Near-Frozen Knat's Urine." This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.

13. From November 10th the UK will harmonise petrol (or "Gasoline," as you will be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2005) prices with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US gallon- get used to it).

14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

16. Last but not the least, and for heaven's sake...it's Nuclear as in "clear" NOT Nucular.

Thank you for your co-operation and have a great day. -John Cleese

HAHAhaha well.. another thing u could do to appreciate british humour a lil bit more is the watch coupling.. really funny stuff..!! Cheers!

strength through unity, unity through faith

2006-03-25T21:14:00.000+08:00

Today.. had a row with mum.. she always has this mentality that she is always right.. its a good thing and a bad thing altogether.. it shows that she take is focused and takes initiative but at the same time, she's single-minded and never wavering.
See it started with me msgin her an ad i saw in the new paper.. in that sms, i mentioned that i could get a new phone for 78 bucks if i traded in my phone. She didnt reply.. i didnt think much of it after that. It rained on my way to novena.. so i used the paper as a make-shift brolly.. well.. no point carrying around a soggy paper right? so i dumped it. Then when i got home.. my mum was showing me all the ads she saw in the other paper.. the new straits times. I was really grateful that my mum was soo enthu abt it that she was doing all this research for me. I told her the ad said it was at turf city.. but she insisted that other places had it as the paper said that there were roadshows at heeren, turf city.. etc etc. I said ok.. i thot she knew what she was saying.. so i just played along. I was rushing to find the real ad online when she said that she was leaving without me and that my dad and her were going to singtel in town. I was like huh?? I'm under starhub.. thats another problem.. my mum never tells me what the hell she's going to do.. i asked her but she didnt give me a good answer.. if i dont know where u are going.. how can i plan anything. I'm not much of a kid anymore.. tho i look like one.. but i should be informed of these things so that my interests and your interests can complement each other instead of conflicting with one another. That aside.. we took a time wasting trip to town... turns out the road shows are different.. my phone is not accepted for trade in at the heeren... so we essentially wasted time, money in getting there and energy. I'm sure all three of us felt dumb.. but i couldnt help but feel that this could have all been avoided if we had just gone to turf city... which is geographically closer to my house... i had no idea that my parents also had the intention of going to singtel.. then my mum throws a fuss at me... well.. i'm very good at not caring about whatever she calls me but it wasnt very nice.. thats why i am grateful i went to st pats... i learnt how to be hard and resist all these things, emotional games dont work well on st pats boys.. we simply dont care or in some cases.. we beat u up.. thats not my style tho hahah. I'm writing this... not in a very good mood right now.. but its happened many times before.. so often that i really dont give a shit.
Good news now!.. I had a wedding dinner the other day.. show u some pics... not in the goody goody mooooood now=)

Freedom! Forever!

2006-03-22T22:04:00.000+08:00

Well, today was a much better day=) The 2 most impt things i had to do this mornin, was to get my ass to the prayer room at 6.55am to facilitate the singing of songs during mass and to read a prayer for morning assembly. I set my clock alarm for 5.10 and my phone alarm at 5.20. I have this bad habit of waking up, shutting the noisy thing up and not waking up for another hour or so. But no! i managed to pull myself out of the seemingly never-ending temptation of the bed and prepare myself to leave the house. Well.. naturally i walked out of the door to leave the house.. duh.. ahhaha then i made my way to the bus stop. Okay.. here lies the everyday situation Daryl B. Chee faces. There are 2 direct buses to CJ.. namely 151 and 154. There is another bus that will take me along the same route but will part the route to CJ at around the 3 quart mark. That bus is 74. Well i was afraid i might be late... so i took the bus.. thinkin that i could stop halfway and board another bus. On the way there, my damn bus was over taken by not only 1 of the buses i could take.. but both. It was soo retarded!! Have u ever ever ever been caught in a situation where u are rushing to be punctual for an appt and the next bus u must take is in front of the bus ure currently on? Well if u think thats bad.. what'd u make of BOTH buses being ahead of u. Hahah i couldnt help but look up to the sky and thank the good lord for his humour. Anw.. i managed to perfectly time my alighting of 74 to the boarding of 154. I managed to catch the bus on the very last common bus stop the 2 buses had. Talk abt luck. I have a feeling that "Do u want to" is my theme song for this year. I've had lots of good luck so far.. *touch wood i hope it wont end soon.
By the will of God, i made it to school on time lol. I sat thru mass and all as per normal.. but then came assembly. The reading i had that morning started with "Confucious once said..." HAHAH i was planning and schemin on how i was gonna make fun of it in my honky accent. AHAH like the russel peters, confucious say.. u go to jail, bad boy thing... ahhaa. But alas came the moment of truth.. i couldnt help but giggle in front of the whole school.. but i couldnt bring myself to do it. I've done it before with the Aslan and the narnia thing but.. i'm sure they'd kill me if i did it again. HAhaha i'm gonna have to wait tilll my term of office is nearly over.. hahah!
I nearly zhaoed chem lect... until i remembered that i had a chem tutorial after that.. wouldnt it be weird if i was assumed to be missing for lecture and then i conveniently pop up for tutorial? HAHAH well.. yeah.. crap happens. I got a C for bio.. the highest grade i;ve ever had.. ahha it was quite tyco and i'm one of the highest in class=) Now my tutor wants an A... hahah i need time my man... time.. SO if u are interested in what i got for my CTs,
GP- C5
Bio- C
Math- O
Chem- O
*now this result i am particularly proud of and i am not ashamed of it!! "AO" level Chinese examination - D7 !!!!! I mean.. its soo difficult to get it on the line.. its easy to blow it or to excel in it.. but a D7.. whoaa!! For both AO and O levels!! Its like DOUBLE-DEE!! It is fantastic.. judging that i passed my orals when i resorted to speakin english to find out what the ruddy question was.. ahahh!!

Okay.. talk time over.

"a building is a symbol...symbols are given power by people... with enough people, blowing up a building could change the world" -V

The verdict is vengence, a vendetta

2006-03-21T21:13:00.000+08:00

I dunno why... My day was a not soo good day. I apologise if my grammar and all is the verys bads now.. i get that way when i'm not soo happy. Okay.. there is always something that causes a person to feel unhappy, the whole action-reaction thing. Anw.. before i bore u with the long talk, i'll just cut straight to the point.
I cant believe my GP tutor miss low cant cut me some slack. She always and only yells at me... i dont recall her giving her a yell at anyone else in class. On this occasion, she yelled at me becos of homework i didnt even know existed and hence, did not do. For this incident, i have to start FRESH from monday. Here goes...
I was walking to school in the morning when i caught up with genevieve low... Being the friendly and sociable person that i am, i said hi to her... i TRIED to stike up a conversation... but i ended up asking her the stupidest question anyone could ask a teacher after a holiday break. I asked her " so ma'am, was there any homework??". Dun remind me.. its stupid.. i know. So she said that by inferring from my question, she assumed that i did not do my work. LIKE BLOODY DUH.... That didnt really make my morning a really happy one.. but oh well.. sorry for the bad language.. just makes me upset.
Okay! now we move on to the welcoming ceremony... it was kinda hilarious cos i was supposed to act out a skit in a solemn manner... but the min i walked on stage, everyone laughed at me.. i think its my smell! ahahh jk. Okay... back to the issue at hand here.... GP period came not to long after the ceremony.. then the first thing she says to us after the holiday break is.."i received very disturbing news from one of ur classmates this morning.. turns out he doesnt even know what work there was"... THIS IS THE LAST TIME I STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION WITH HER. Then she goes into freak mode and yells at everyone abt how we are so mechanically minded that we only regurgitate what is taught to us and we cant read the question properly.. this was all in light of the devastating GP compre CT results we got back. She yelled at me, she yelled at anyone that tried to give her an answer.. i reckon she'd have yelled at ur mother if she was there. Funny how she asked us a few months ago, why does her classes dislike her. Well, the answer is obvious isnt it... Okay.. so this happened, and she tells me that she wants 3 essay outlines by tmr... the same 3 essay outlines that my colleagues were given a week to do. Not only is that nearly impossible due to time constraints.. but its mentally draining as well. But thats not her problem... missy wants it tmr.. and u have abt 12 hours to do it... Okay... fancy this, i had lunch, went for a physically tiring soccer training till 7.30.. got home at abt 8.30... had dinner till 9.30.. managed to do 1 essay outline before i knocked out on my bed.. i was EXHAUSTED... completely drained. I thought that she'd be a reasonable person and give me some more time and acknowledge my effort to at least attempt the bloody thing. NO. Today when i returned to school.. she asks me if i completed it.. of course i said no.. i mean i dun lie abt such things... THEN missy goes into freak mode and telling me how irresponsible i am.. how soccer is not impt and i;m wasting my life... it was almost like telling me to lock myself in a cell and study for the rest of my life... I am a semi adult.. maybe not by looks or by actions but by right.. and i at least deserved to be talked to like one.. dont fucking infantilize me.. i'm not a kid tho i may look like one..hee hee. Okay... so she tells me i MUST complete it by today 5pm.. i tell her i got PE till 4.. honestly.. would you enthusiastically run to do ur work after mass PE? and be able to complete 2 bloody essay outlines by 5? Shit no.. so i told her my predicament and she oh soooo sooo "mercifully" extneds it to 6... no fucking difference mate.... I requested politely aft my GP lesson if i could hand it in by tmr morning at 7.30am.. at least i have the night to neatly type it out and produce work with quality..but all she says with every word i utter is "no""no""no""no"... i mean wtf... i can take a verbal beating and face embarassment in front of my classmates but this was seriously the limit.. Again.. i didnt do anything.. i couldnt be fucking bothered to pursue and persuade her to extend the limit... i'm not a person that will grovel on his knees to gain mercy.. i have my principles..
Well... its a well known fact that the lesser the amt of time u have.. the lower the quality of your work... well.. given the time constraints.. i had no choice but to do the work fast and in a slipshod manner.. i just borrowed my friend's points instead of wreckin my brains to find them and i just elaborated... not bad for a rushed job.. i stuffed it in her face at 4.15pm... I know that its not all her fault and that she's a super bitch and all.. i had a part to play.. if i didnt rely soo much on receiving info instead of seeking it.. i might have done the damn work. But we must make the best of whatever situation we are put in.. She either yells at me because she's bored and hates my face.. or she does it because she knows i can do soo much better.. i reckon its the latter but she presents it in such a way that is demeaning, down-right depressing and oppressive. Jesus.. i even made a song for her because of the depressive aura she has.. it goes to the tune of u had a bad day.
"cos i had a bad day,
what happened is gay.
She keeps yelling at me,
i got nothing to say.
She says u should know,
i said i didnt know.
I didnt do the work,
so i may not grow (lol)"

Besides that... i think i'll talk abt the good things today... later...!

OXYGEN! Orientation 2!

2006-03-13T21:47:00.000+08:00

NOW i must apologise for NOT updating this god forsaken blog or should i say darcy-forsaken blog hee hee for such a long time. I must admit i have had a real hell of a time these past few months and my life has been turned upsidedown, turned over and out and everything else. I had a rough time with a few girls and i really mean a rough time, they kept forcing me into decisions that i really didnt want to make. What i;m trying to say is that i really hate hurting pple.. i'm a relatively friendly person and i hate it when an absolute comes into the picture. You gotta understand that 10 years in an all boys school has kept me partying in a sausagefest and restricted my interactions with the other sex. It was a hell of a change when i came to college. ANYWAY, soooo many things have happened since i last posted sth on this blog, so much so that if i did write it down, your computers will all crash trying to load it and my fingers would have eroded away. Therefore, according to le chateliers priciple, the equilibrium... LoL just kidding there!

Okay, here is the rough draft;)

I watched date movie today! It was damn funny!! altho it didnt appeal to everyone. It was crude at some points in the movie but an overall joy to watch! I give it a 7 on a scale from 1 to 10 in terms of entertainment. B4 the movie, we did some mahjoor bowling. I mean.. i havent bowl for like a century and i havent attained below 100 points in ages. But today... i did.. ahha its either becos the lane is too damn oily, the balls are screwed up or the player is dead lousy. Chuckles freaking drew first blood on the first frame by gettin a damn strike. How she did it remains a mystery. We played 2 games and she nearly did it again but only nicking 9 pins instead of 10. During the 6th or sth frame, i was gonna take my shot. The ball was already being swung when graham had to open his mouth and say "DARCY U GOT 100!". That was an obvious lie but it distracted me no doubt and then the ball was released. i was expecting a gutter ball when the ball BANGED the middle and STRIKE!!! HAHAHA super duper tyco shit. Then here comes the ridiculous part! After my shot, graham scored a strike and jared, who took his shot aft graham scored another strike! We were like "THE SENTINEL ARE OWNING!!" AHAH funny stuff. Okay! B4 bowling, we all went for some arcading. HAhaha now i will tell u all a secret!! I Para para!! ahha i got chuckles to do it and graham as well! Its freaking funny as we didnt do all the fanciful unnecessary shit moves pple do.. we were just struggling to hit the sensor. Argh!

Okay, i'm getting lazy again. damn.

IGNITE @ CJC Orientation

2006-01-10T19:56:00.000+08:00

HAHAHA i havent written in ages so to all my readers.. i owe u an apology. I've been really caught up this week and the week before that and blah blah. Not to mention that i was DEAD LAZY. HAhaha i sure will miss waking up at 12 noon everyday=) Merry christmas ya'll!! And a very happy new year! I was really really lazy to update my blog so it kinda died for a while. My life has been turned upside down, over and out, left, right and center this week. I have soo many things to say, so much so that if i "write" or type it out rather, blogger will crash.

Firstly! Christmas! Its a standard procedure for me every single jolly xmas=) Of course i gave up the whole santa claus thing already cos he really really doesnt exist so i'm sorry kids. Its always mass in the morning, then paternal grandparent's place for lunch then its maternal grandMOTHER's place for dinner. Yes, my maternal grandad passed away before i knew him. Oh his annerversary is tmr so if u want, pls pray for him. Speaking of which!!! My mother's elder sister's husband aka uncle died last night at 8pm. His wake was today at 8pm ironically. But i HATE wakes and i hate the idea of death. I welcome it but i dun enjoy the aftermath of someone's passing. I wasnt close to him anyway.. and when i did see him.. he was always a jerk to me. But he is family so.. i take off my hat to him. Back to xmas, mumy got pissed with me cos i slept thru mass and slept when we got home so she had to keep trying to wake me up to go my granny's place. She gave up, took dad and drove off, leaving my sis and i at home. I wasnt really affected because i can play that psycho game as well.. i just turned the telly on and stayed there. We got a call eventually to ask us why we were soo rude as to not pay our respects to our grandparent on xmas but the way i see it, it wasnt my bloody fault that u drove off is it? Sorry.. thinkin of the incident just puts me off. Oh yeah.. i kept dozing off because i spent the night in town with sam and grace till about 4..

28th dec: Sissy's 20th Bday!! Hahah we had crystal jade la mian xiao long bao for lunch at great world and then i left them to go meet my cousins (2 gals from china) in town. They were late so i decided to go shopping. I spent 315 dollars that day in a shopping spree.... but i didnt spend entirely on myself mind u... I bought us all dinner.. actually that was my mum's orders to give the chinese gals a treat as their xmas present. I kept flirting with the waitress who served us. Oh.. we ate at the wheelock fish and co. and the bill came up to S$104 Hahahha..

NYE: Funny shit!! Hahahah words cannot describe this night... the best night i've had in YEARS ( no pun intended) We went to tash's house for the party and countdown! I'll just summarise what happened because i really have no time.. i have a bio test tmr.. ANW! I met the council bunch in Newton mrt station which is close to tash's place. Claudio aka DJ Chock was already drinking beer ahhaha!! He kept saying "Eh eh darcy!! Eh stone cold steve austin la Fuck fear, Drink beer!" Hahah he kept offerin but i was a good boy and drank milk instead=) no kidding.
Okay.. We went there and started to watch football.. We were watchin the liverpool match which was damn boring and stupid and becos there were a few liverpool fans in the house. There was only like 1 or 2 goals in that match? The other match on channel 24.. the man u match.. THere were freaking 5 goals!! And we missed every single one of them... THATS RIGHT!! LIVERPOOL SUCKS ARE THEY'RE BORING! Hear that paddy?!! Anw.. Claudio took charge of the drinks and he makes BAD drinks.. if u want a mix.. he will give u half or 3/4 cup FULL of vodka and top it off with coke.... No wonder he got drunk in like 10 mins.. Anyway! We brought down a Hifi system and the living room became a dance floor. Welcome to NYE@ Tash's place. Claudio would keep going into the kitchen in the middle of each song and come out when a new one started. He'd come out saying "yeah! yeah! this is my song, Lets dance!! come darcy lets dance!" At this point... ahahha we alr started laughin=) Well.. we carried on till 2355 when we watch channel 5 do the countdown thing!! HAhaha Josie sprayed the damn foam in the livin room and destroyed my drink lol! and he made the living room super slippery becos the foam is like soap suds=) So i asked claudio to make me a new drink.. i had a sip or two... put it down, went to dance and when i got back.. it was gone! i didnt know that had cleaners in Tash's "club". And this my friends, is the secret to how darcy never got high during NYE. HAHAH okay okay.. i will tell u more next time.

O1!!!: I love the j1's.. i love IG2... i love T08 and i Love Cj. I can summarise it soo soo easily. I was made for Cj and i know it. It runs in my blood and i made the right choice. I will say mroe on orientation later.. i'm still suffering from how great it was! U guys rocked!! J1s i mean.. i wish i was in J1 again... sure as hell doesnt feel like J2. I would have wanted to follow the j1s to whatever end.. but that can never be... i have responsibilities i better start living up to. The first being, start studying for my bloody bio test! Ciaos!

wtf mate.

2005-12-23T18:53:00.000+08:00

I'm aint feeling soo good at the moment. I just had a nap and i am still feeling groggy and a lil hung over. This week was probably one of the most tiring and vexing weeks of the whole bloody year apart from the exam time.. monday and tuesday was the coucil precamp thing which kinda took up the whole day. Wednesday i hosted a movie marathon at my place. Thursday had invigorate @ gotham which i will write a whole essay on and finally friday, now.. sleep and major headache. Haha.... i've just lost my motivation to write abt it. Just ask me what happened next time.. i think i need another nap.

One word- Shagged.

2005-12-20T16:38:00.000+08:00

K manz.. i just got back from the national stadium at freaking kallang.. It was a super duper uber tiring day. We are preparing ourselves for the upcoming orientation for the 1st 3 mths students in cj. I can tell u that it is a really exhausting task as it is and i ain even in the planning committee. Their problems extend to killin point.. jared.. dun worry aye? i'll give u a back rub on thursday. Anw! This Precamp session was today and yesterday. It was held in school yesterday and in city hall today.

Since yesterday, i've begun to enjoy every time i enter cjc. I feel really really proud to be a cjc student and i lament the thot of leaving that wonderful school. Now, while plannin for the next year's batch of students, i look back to my orientation and my choice of college. I had a chance to go ACJC but since i did not meet their initial requirements, i was posted to my second choice CJ. On the first day of school, i still thot to myself that i dont belong here.. so much so that i made myself alien and oblivious to what was going on. But after the second day, my mind was made up, i called up and withdrew my application to ACJC. It was a difficult decision for me and i had to super pang seh ryan.. i'll owe him forever for that.I kinda had this instinct that i belonged in cj, my heart belonged in cj. Not only that, the other facts all played like a movie scene before me, i have followed a catholic education all the way, this was where my score can get me, my sister was from this school, the archbishop was tellin everyone during homily that catholics should attend catholic schools and not go for the more reputed schools just for fame and academics. I also had this super freaky premonition. I had this really weird dream last year... i dreamt that i ahd turned behind while descending a mountian in a foreign country and saw a bunch of people i didnt know, all in a single row behind me. We were all lined up in single file becos the passage way was really narrow. I woke up after that... since it was all foreign to me, i ignored it. Haha, now here comes the freaky part. During my OCIP trip to kota tinggi, mawai in malaysia, we climbed a mountain as part of our expedition. We were descending a narrow part and i turned behind to talk to leslie who was behind me. At that very moment... i suddenly recalled the weird dream i had. De ja vu balls!!! I had lived the exact moment i had dreamt of! Its super freaky how u can see the future sometimes... But i took this as affirmation and it reassured me that CJ is and was supposed to be where i belong. Cj rox.

Anw.. we had this major walk from city hall mrt station at 7.30 in the morning to memorial park to anderson bridge to shenton way to beach road to kallang to the national stadium. It was damn tiring and i didnt have breakfast! Eddie and i just felt like slowly driftin away from the main group and go have breakfast at macs. Turns out, there is no macs in shenton way. We kept getting lost too... maybe it was because the girls had the map=)

Anw... i gotta go change and stuff... shit... neh mind.. i'll come back later. Turns out my cousin did very well for his n lvl so he is throwin a dinner at changi village... omg... i live in clementi la...

OH BTW!!! IT WAS SANTOS'S AND LEMO'S BIRTHDAY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY PINOY AND NEMO!

Ang mo theory.

2005-12-16T23:30:00.000+08:00

Why does everyone ask me, when they first meet me, why i speak with a lil accent? lol. Its happened since the dark ages and it happened again today. Well.. today was not too bad actually. Haha it was my dear cuz 13yr old bday. I needed to be there to ease his assimilation into being a teenager lol. Okay.. today, i had a promo meetin at 10 in school. I set my alarm for 8.45. It rang on time as a good alarm should but i slapped it a lil and made it snooze. Hahah at 9, i decided that i would wake up so i decided to turn it off and get rdy. Next thing i knew, i woke up again thanks to a phone call from tash. I didnt pick it up tho... i kinda knew i was in trouble=) It was 10am. Lol.. i mentioned b4 that my room has this hypnotic effect.. haha i can never seem to wake up on time. Anw! Cabbed to school and turns out the meetin was to learn the new mass dance... its DAMN FUN!! haha i'm really lookin forward to Orientation 01 next yr!! Anw... went to raffles marina to canoe=) Haha there, i met these 2 ang mo kids sailin a topper. one was 12 and the other 11, ken and jonathan respectively. Hahahha my cousin's friends and i played with em NOT IN A PEDO WAY! HAhaha we rammed each other like mad!! They asked if i was local.. ahhah i told them i was japanese at first lol, then i told them i was bullshittin and then i said i'm really from korea! Hahaha eventually i told em i was born and bred here in the lovely island of singapore! ahhaha well.. ken asked me if i was anglo-chinese.. a mix la... in our terms.. ahha he told me he thot so because i speak really well. I get soo flattered when pple say that. This other gal in town that wanted me to donate asked me if i was a mix and i told her YES! hahhaha we all know thats a bloody lie ainnit? Ever since i was a kid.. i've hung around with ang mo kids cos of where i lived and my mum's colleague's kids. My mum works for an american company u see. Now if u wonder why i'm like that... ahah well now u know! I've always had a knack for buildin rapport with ang mo's.

Council peeps had another movie marathon the day b4. Hahahha this time.. it was hosted by alex. But her mum is super duper fierce man... OMG. She had good intentions but STILL!! FIERCE! I'm hosting the next one and we wanna watch AMERICAN PIE 1,2,3,4!!! Deuce Bigalo the latest one! HAHHA madness!!! My mum doesnt care abt talkin abt sex.. in fact.. she does it quite regularly so.. that might explain a lil of why i'm sick=) Oh yea.. so she doesnt care if we watch all these stuff. My dad? He wouldnt care if we drank alcohol in my house... he'll even provide it! Thats cos we have too much of it.. cos we always buy it from the duty free shop when we go overseas.

I've been thinkin quite a lot lately.. mostly due to the holidays where i spend many an hour doing absolutely nth at all. I've always cheered pple up when they get rejected but i never really thot abt mine.. i've always brushed it off as if it was nth... But for several individual.. the impact is really... impactful lol! ahhaahah i dunno... but i love my life as it is. Oh yeah, apparently this gal named wan ting from t12 is my orientation co-facil. Hahah i hear that she is small, talkative and "cute" to some extent.. i dunno.. wont let that cloud my judgement aye. Anw i wanna talk on msn now... hahahha Cya all.

Oh here is a/ the random game i'm apparently supposed to play along with. Take it down and pass it around!

Rules Of The Game:
1. post five weird/random stuffs about yourself.
2. at the end of the post, list the name of 5 people who you want next to do this.
3. leave a comment "you are tagged" in their blog and tell them to read your blog for rules.

5 random stuff:
1. I love italian food
2. I dont have much confidence in my soccer skills
3. I'm a big flirt according to some people=)
4. I'm sensitive about my narrow shoulders and i'm tryin to build it up
5. I mix well or i prefer to hang out with IJ and SCGS girls

5 people i'm passing the baton to
1. Aloy -to give u sth to do
2. Wei Xin -So that u will spend at least some time NOT muggin
3. Liang Pei -cos u think i'm a complete weirdo
4. Paddy - for being my best friend
5. Elena -cos u're short and never at home=)

Hmmm boring holidays

2005-12-13T23:54:00.000+08:00

Okay FINALLY i managed to get some outtage!! Was able to go out today and the day before. I dont know why stayin at home is just soo soo boring... when guys get bored.. we tend to start thinking abt sex.. or is that just me? HAHAH! Anw! Mr Darcy over here and his associate Mr Paddy can conclude or have concluded for that matter, that 80% of all conversations guys have definitely involves a tinch of sex at least. So gals! Now u know what guys think. It will take another 85 years of research to find out what women want.. its a real problem that one.

Anw.. Yesterday i had a dental appt at 1115. The quack said if i was a good boy and wore my rubber bands on my braces 24/7, i could prolly remove the braces today.. or yesterday for that matter. But as u know... i DIDN'T. So yeah... maybe the next appt in jan. I was hopin to wake up at 8.45 but my new-look room has this hypnotic feelin abt it. So i got up, smashed the alarm clock from %&*^ing annoying me and fell asleep. Thank god for a very very good smaritan who's oversea's msg came at 10 sharp. Any later... whoo hoo! Another 6-8 weeks of waiting. I got there 10 mins b4 the appt started, i proved u wrong at! i was NOT late!! HAHA! jk.

Aft that... i made my way to somerset to meet jared or aka bovril to bruz and just hang out. Great day it was. We watched saw 2! Whoa hoo!! But i was seriously expecting more blood and guts... so it aint that bad in terms of gore. We did some serious lannage aft that with Llyod the man! He was the commander in Battlefield 2... Ownge.. i just sniped jared in the head the whole time... they never found me till much later! Oh.. i was at the top of a building guys... Saw hayl aft that... MAN i was her height in sec 3!! But now? Heheheh all i can say is that times change aye hayl? I was dressed like a geek tho... i was wearin my specs... i'm trying to save my last monthly pair till next month.

The dota game last night was a great battle of the century!! We made a great comeback to win the match.. Unforgettable... Anw! Went to Boon lay for lunch today.. had Xiao long bao and blew like 43 bucks for the 3 of us. Aloy, Wei Xin and i. Its quite ok cos its also cos i never celebrated my bday with em.. treated em to ice cream tho. We went to jurong east to watch Perhaps love.. all i can say is that.. THE STORY MAKES NO SENSE. U can roughly get the idea but its soo confusing and complicated. There is this random noodle man who happens to be sth else and shit... i just kept laughin at their horrible acting. u wanna know a good show? Watch Khaal Ho Nal Ho.. i freakin cried. And mind u, real men dont cry! But i look like a boy so its quite alright.

Haiz... apparently there is school work.. but for crying out loud.. its the fucking holidays man! Enjoy it. Oh Nader my dearest cousin from london is gonna try and help me get sth so that i get get into clubs easily. All i gotta do is say i'm from britian and put on a lil accent. "Hello there! I would like to go into the club for a spot of tea and scones. Thank you, kind gentlemen.." Hehehehhe.

Anw... my sis is bakin cookies... think i'll go take a few. i cant write on an empty stomach=)

Luv y'all!

chritmas is coming!

2005-12-11T23:56:00.000+08:00

Ho ho ho!! I'm feeling the xmas jazz alr!! As it is... i went to church today.. after managing to skip like 3 weeks of it=) heh heh. its not a good thing but there wasnt anything special abt it. Its the same thing all the time.. Noisy kids, parents who deserve to get shot for not knowing what to do abt their kids, grandparents that should be shot twice for pamperin the kids... ARGH. There was this bunch of kids sittin in the pew in front of me and they were pulling each other's ear trying to whisper. Of course their whisper is almost the same as shouting so that really was quite pointless.

Renovated is my room as of late=) u know what they say, a man's house is his castle. In this case.. i am quite young to own a house so for the mean time, my room is my sleeping place. LOL. I painted it myself and i think i did a smacking good job. Its a mixture of desert orange and lily white. My parents forced me to get a new "zen" wardrobe so yeah thats done. If u want, come stay over at my place. Then again... i still dunno who on earth my audience is on blogger. LOL.

I play soccer close to everyday at the park down the road.. i need to cycle there tho. Elena my classmate "neighbour" who lives there, refuses to come watch me play and mingle with the other pple there. I know why tho! Hmmm in math terms, Let 'G' be the unknown;) Anw!! back to soccer. I dunnoo... i have this uncanny ability to injure people. Apparently i hit this guy named jamal on the neck with some kind of judo chop and he had a stiff neck for 2 days. I didnt know abt until joyce told me abt it. The pple there are nice and i may not have known them for a long time but i prob have some interesting stories stored in my mem=) Then yesterday... i crippled Akesh after many hard but legal tackles. He told me that unlike many other players who come in from the side and use their legs to win the ball, i jump and sandwich myself btween the ball and the player who has it. I mean.. i am a small player.. i cant beat him physically can i? The way i play can annoy pple sometimes... maybe they're jealous?!? We'll never know ahhaha. Yay! at is coming back from shanghai tmr but then she's gg overseas again... seems like a holiday aft a holiday is very common! i went to mawai.. oaky.. maybe thats not a holiday but it still qualifies.. then i went to kl aft that. Somehow.. i love malaysia. I scored today.. some pretty nice goals i might add.. ahahha i managed to take 1 lil nick on the ball before the last man tackled me and it rolled past the keeper who was off his line. He tried to run back and get it but if he did, he'd give the ol tree a headbutt.. and trust me.. it kinda hurts.

YES! i get to go out again finally!! after being cooped up in my pad for the past week doing up my room.. this is a breather. I got a dental appt at 1115 am and i pray to god that i can remove my braces. The quack did promise me. Then watchin SAW2 in town with jared and co. yay!

Anw! To get y'all in the christmass mood too.. this is one of my favorite carols. Speakin of which i want to do some majjoor carolling. Cheers men. TAG PLS!

Sleigh bells ring, are you listening,

In the lane, snow is glistening

A beautiful sight,We're happy tonight.

Walking in a winter wonderland.

Gone away is the bluebird,

Here to stay is a new bird

He sings a love song,

As we go along,

Walking in a winter wonderland.

In the meadow we can build a snowman,

Then pretend that he is Parson Brown

He'll say: Are you married?

We'll say: No man, But you can do the job

When you're in town.

Later on, we'll conspire,

As we dream by the fireTo face unafraid, The plans that we've made,

Walking in a winter wonderland.

In the meadow we can build a snowman,

And pretend that he's a circus clown

We'll have lots of fun with mister snowman,

Until the other kids knock him down.

When it snows, ain't it thrilling,

Though your nose gets a chilling

We'll frolic and play, the Eskimo way,

Walking in a winter wonderland.

Happy christmas guys.

yesterday once more.

2005-12-08T01:32:00.002+08:00

Well!! i'm back from KL now... haha i got to admit i'm rather pleased with myself. I did some crazyass shopping at KLCC and Jalan Petaling(Chinatown). We stayed in PNB Darby park suites which was something like a small apartment cos there was 12 of us. Thank goodness the hotel i stayed in had cable... otherwise i'd die watching my cousins and their friends either watching the disney channel, nickelodeon or playin the xbox or ps2. I mananged to catch the liverpool v wigan match and also the aresenal v bolton match( arsenal lost btw... 2-0). Its difficult for me to find video games fun anymore.. i used to be crazy over it but somehow.. JC has really changed me a lot. I used to be some nerdy ass prefect that obeyed the rules most of the time.. but now... hahah lets just say i think i've blossomed since then. Anw!! Petaling street is a crazy ass place... the cops drive right thru the street where many stalls are, forcing them to part like the red sea. They did it the last time i was there and they did it again this time...

Somehow.. u can think of petaling street as the floatin market in thailand where there are loads of street stalls. Hahahah the merchants are a bunch of shrewds... Hahaha they will explode the price when u first ask and when u threaten to leave... they offer it to u for almost more than 70% less than what they originally said. Hahaha sometimes.. they even bloody shout. Damn. There was this guy who shouted at my aunt's friend becos she wanted him to change a shirt that had a defect but he yelled and he was being an overall dick. I dunno what happened in the end cos i didnt want to add fuel to the fire.. so i went on with my shopping. On the first day.. i managed to get a cap for RM15, a nike football shirt for RM20, a nice pair of shoes for RM60 and nice jacket for RM45.

Knn... there's like lightning and shit going on right now and my mummy is naggin on how i need to turn it off and how stubborn i am... blah blah.. laters.

Gone tmr...

2005-12-02T23:49:00.000+08:00

Easy bruz.....

I am a going on a journey tomorrow... hahahah this is becos i needa break. Hahhah i'm actually at my cousin's pad right now.. I need to stay over so that i can leave early tmr morning in the car.. must avoid jam at the 2nd link ya know. If anybody wants anything from KL pls let my mum know ahhaha u can sms me... Oh... i switched sim cars with my mum today so that i'll have roamin tmr in malaysia... So that i can make calls to some special pple.

HAHAH I love malaysia.... disclaimer: I love the place and the food... not much for the people... hehehe.. bad experience la..

Anw... Today was a mad rush day... my initial plan was to stay at home and slack until abt 2.30. Then i was supposed to make my way from my place in clementi all the way to nyjc in serangoon. But... i got this mad call at abt 2ish... my cuz was askin me if i wanted to go KL tmr. FANTASTIC... my passport wasnt valid...

SO! I still had household chores to do... I had to pack my bag to go KL for 4 days and leave enough space for the mad shopping i was going to do... i needed to rush to SIR to update my passbook.. i needed to get my ASS to nyjc by 3.45 for prematch warmup.

Hahahha managed to do everything tho.. hahahha the lady at the sir place said i didnt look like the picture in the passbook.. Hahahha but i really had no time to snap a nice photo of myself at that time... i was super late for my prematch warm up..

Knn... gtg liao... i need to rest a lil b4 i go KL tmr.. i hope they got a com there so i can finish this retard epsiode...

Today!

2005-11-30T17:44:00.000+08:00

I think that today was a really good day. So far at least. Now i'm in this new cybercafe in cine at lvl 9. Its really cool and they have this super promotion of $3.50 for 2 hours and the coms are pretty good. Went to see chicken little and i got a Freaking baby soother for my birthday. Someone apparently thinks i'm a baby.. i think that person is one too (no names mentioned)! ahahha! No offence aye? Aparrently that someone thinks i'm chicken little too... ahaha now u are on santa's naughty list heheheh! I really enjoyed myself and this crazy perfume man came up to us askin us to try out his product. We TOLD him we werent interested but i got interested when he said "just sample the thing first and if u like it, i'll elaborate but if u dont, i'll just fuck off". Now thats a cool salesman man...

I really CAN NOT stand all those pple who hunt u down in town askin u to donate to their cause or some shit. I usually do it for flag day but this one is really buay tahan... Now i am waiting for the guys dota game to end so that i can play cos i came in late... hahahah its damn funny cos they're gettin owned and they keep screaming cos they keep dying.... haiz... they need me to intervene la....

My china cuz are gg back to the motherland for holiday.. hahah the youngest one laughed when i was cuttin my hair.. watch out... i'm still going for the japo look..

OOH another thing i have to say is that RONIN rocks to hell!!! They are super good. When they played yesterday at the J2 grad night, They told the crowd to go wild, go chinablack, get piss drunk and high AND GET LAID!!! HAhaha and little did they know... Brother paul wasnt too happy... ahahaha. THEY ROCK. oh oh oh oh... oh oh oh oh.. dancing with black maria!! I wanna go zoukout if i can... i need to partyy!!

LOL Sorry tash but apparently i heard that u guys could not get into coco or chinablack cos of the id issue... heng ah... i didnt go. WE NEED FAKE IDs. hahah lol... Teen drinking is very bad... i got a fake id tho!

Damn...

Anw.. the game has ended... brendan and all lost... as expected inferring from their screams. HAhahah kk i'm gg now... laters bruz.

Thinking too much.

2005-11-28T23:56:00.000+08:00

As the title suggests... i feel as tho i'm thinking too much. Things have happened. Things that by right, shouldnt happen but happened anyway. But breaking thru this ice is a good thing and i'm very happy i got it out.

Okayz! Away from that now.. Daryl is feelin rather happy! I know my last post did make a lot of people feel awkward and i must apologise for that.. i wasnt feelin very good on that day.. it was kinda ruined at the same time. My mum had this office dinner function on my bday itself at sentosa. I was allowed to go out but i had to be back by 5. Honestly.. can u really go out with ur friends, have a good time and expect to be back home at 5? Anw, whats worse is that the dinner function was one of those things where u sit there like a fish out of the water. I sat there doing nothing for a good 4 hours. But i cheered up when i got this msg asking me if i wanted to go for a movie marathon. Thanks tash!! Anw... we watched taxi and taxi 3 and i SWEAR its a freaking good random movie. HHAHA Its really really good!!

Okay.. skip the flashback. Here is what happened today. I woke up at ten and i had a council meeting at ten. I really hate being late but somehow or rather i always am late. I rushed there in a cabby and by the time i got there.. the meetin ended... lol. So fuck that... I went to town to find out abt some chickren rice delivery for the councillors dinner tmr! I was supposed to meet terence at like 1230? Anw... I sat in BK all by myself waiting for the bugger and when he finally got back to me.. i found out the ding dong was sleepin when i called. Pang seh boss that one.... But but but!! I thank god for the council... i met up with them for lunch at thai express. But b4 that.. i went to visit cornyyy at adidas and i bought a nice white shoebag=) I splurged loads of money on myself today.. ahahha i was in the mood. I'm gonna hurry this up... ahhah We went for soccer where we won 5-4 in a very exciting match.. i didnt play tho.. we were down by 2 goals and a.ho decided not to sub me in. damn.. ahhah terence scored tho!! Thats what a few more hours of sleep does aye?

Anw... Terence and i went for dinner at pepper lunch which was enjoyable but a lil pricey... Anw.. i've been saying a lot of anws.. ahahah ANW i wanna go play some games... OUT

Disappointment..

2005-11-27T15:16:00.000+08:00

I have much to say abt my mawai trip=) But for the moment, i can officially conclude that i am not as happy as i thot i would be. Many of my friends and even my closests friends forgot my bday. I know its the thot that counts but the thought of that person not caring for you does cross my mind ocassionally. After all the effort u take to remember your friend's special day and give them a call or a msg to brighten up their day, you'd kinda expect the same treatment. Then again... ahhahah it doesnt really matter.

Mawai was wet, miserable, rainy but an overall good experience for my peeps and i. Ironically, it rained everyday we were there and it only stopped on the morning of our departure. Like wtf la! hahaha. Okay.... The camp was built on a shallow swamp so it was perpetually wet and moist. We slept in a hall built on stilts. My class peeps and graham slept at the side of the hall where the water was just over the railing. Hahaha to walk to the mess hall or the toilet, we had to walk thru a long stretch of mud. Its the clayey type of mud that OOZES. So for a late night toilet break, the guys and i decided that pissing over the railing into the water below was a much better idea!

Anw... to tell u all of this would be soo boring, you would die. So its either u were there or not=) ehheheh. I dunno la... i'm just really not in the mood to write abt stuff now. I'm still a lil unsatisfied.

Get ready mawai.

2005-11-18T22:54:00.000+08:00

In a few days time, i should be going to mawai to do all sorts of stuff ehehhehe. I'm not in the mood to write right now.. i just feel so pang sehed and i pang sehed ppl. Ah well... What we are gonna do is to go star gazing. Apparently when we go there, venus and mars will be visible at the same time. One of the things i'd reall wanna do with someone special is to go down to someplace with no clouds and just star gaze... ahhhhhhhh!

For the past week or so, i've been paintin my room ORANGE!! I really can conclude that the colour of the year is orange... Geez even my class colour is orange!! You really got to see us together... i really love my class... i may not show it.. but i do. Okay... Harry potter is kinda disappointin but emma is still my favourite.. i nearly divorced her for fleur when she was in her swimsuit but but but!! I AM FAITHFUL U KNOW. Oh and hey! Apparently i'm the IC of my group during the mawai trip.. i dunno if thats a good thing or bad thing. Heres the situ... There are 6 leaders, 5 girls and 1 boy (me). I "should" be happy those odds... but i really aint..
(I'm gonna die one day for that)

AND THE BEST PART IS Mr tan hoe teck said that he based his selection of leaders solely on HEIGHT. I was like.... FUCK. AHahhaha okay okay.. its a good bad thing. Ohhhkaayyy I went out with ans and all yesterday... and made a new friend named, Vinot... he's a really funny guy who cant help sayin things in the cinema. Jeanette was super causually dressed like she was going to the market or sth and she was shivering her pants off in the cinema... lol... Thats what u get!!!!!!! I swear harry potter is becoming more and more sexual.. i've thot abt it sometimes... Jk rowling should write an adult version of her book.. of course when all of em are old enough=) But as it is!! Moaning mytle insists on seeing harry's dick, Cedric wanting harry to take a shower and play with his egg, the french girls giving a sexual moan during the ceremony... a lil too much for a kids show dont u think?

Oh oh... I have to live up to my name right??? Daryl B. Chee (bitchy)=) so i'm gonna talk abt some shit. Firstly.. why the fuck cant people say thank you when u hold the door open for then... its not as if its a "you're supposed to do it for me" kind of thing. I mean... what the fuck... sorry... It also works the other way round... Why cant they hold it open for u? I mean... these things are basic, anybody knows that.. Worst still.. they do it with their chins held high.. sometimes i just feel like yelling at them. Secondly, why why why must people rush into the train... its so fucking annoying when u're not even out yet and this horde of people are rushing in so that they can hopefully get a seat. I've found a good remedy tho... just barge ur way out and shoulder charge them if u can. Its this attitude that just annoys me.... Damn... i dont feel like writing anymore..

Oh! Just one more thing, i made my debut fot blackjack football club yesterday and i played the full 90 minutes. I can conclude that darcy is very very unfit and my stamina is kaputs. But but, i contributed to the first goal by playing the ball back. We did pretty good actually seeing that this was like the reserve squad and we only had 11 players with no substitutes. The other team had like 16 players which they kept changing and even cheerleaders wearing their jersey. Final score was 2-2 thanks to a last last last min goal by the other team. I picked up a few injuries but nth serious. Overall.... i think i could have done better but i did good for my debut.

and all the things that you never ever told me
and all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
never coming hom
enever coming home
could i? should i?
and all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
for all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me

Catch y'all later.

Love is in the air

2005-11-15T20:47:00.000+08:00

What a wonderful thing love is. It can make or break a person. It can shake the foundations of any building. It can make me talk like this.....

Hahahah fact of the matter is... love IS truely in the air. Its funny how the holidays bring love and joy and in this season of christmas, one must learn to love. Things i never expected to happen is happening and i personally think its a good thing! But dun listen to a guy who has NO experience in this kind of jazz. =)

Besides wastin 2 mins of my life talkin abt sth i dont really know, here's the story today....
Morning: Soccer gym trainin..... it was good for the first bit where gym work is easy esp when there is aircon... BUT a 5km run aft that did the damage... I cant even move my legs properly now and when it does, its like spasmin.... IT SUCKS. I had to take a raincheck on gg out with lesmana and the bunch cos i was SOO tired...

Well.. aft that, dwayne and i walked to almost every bloody mph and times bookstore tryin to find the harry potter book in the adult cover.... of course i didnt get it cos there wasnt any.. everywhere we went its like " sorry, sold out"... I cant be angry cos its a fact but i am cos i really wanted to read it.

Oh btw for those of u who do not know yet.. I LOVE EMMA WATSON AND I ALWAYS WILL... any guy wanna take, come thru me dammit...

Back to business, erm.... damn i forgot what i wanted to say... hmmm just let y'all know what i'm listenin to now.. " if we're going nowhere..... yeah we say.. if its not enough.. yeah we say sing without a reason to ever faaaalllllll IIIINNN LLLLOOOOVVEEEEEEE". sorry... ahahha a lil mad there. Oh and we stripped paddy to his undies in the gym.. we lucky lucky, we're so lucky cos michael tan our DM walked in 3 mins after he put his clothes back on=) Paddy.. be happy we left the underwear untouched.. no one wanted to touch it anw...

Another lazy sunday

2005-11-13T20:41:00.000+08:00

Thanks y'all=) for all ur tags. Its very very difficult to come up with things to write when there is dota to be played=)

Tash forgive me!!! Dota is seriously seriously the governing factor of almost all manly guys right now. Today when i played at asteroids in katong shoppin center, this super old man came in and started playin online. WHOA. I cant imagine myself 40 yrs down the road from now callin a bunch of youngsters, noobs.... R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Who so ever needs or wants to learn more abt dota pls contact darcy the dota guru;) hahahha lololol jk.

Anw.. i havent been feelin really up and going this past month and the month b4 that. The promos really.. i dun wanna say it... ah nvm.... FUCKED UP. Sorry kiddies!! dun let ur parents see that or they'll have a bad impression of darcy. Paddy my man.... i wanted to go all the way with u.. ahha i've even contemplated, no not suicide for the love of god... but i've thot abt u actually being my best man at my "wedding". Then again.. i haev lotsa fantasies and the best man is reserved for really good good buddies of mine. I'm really thankful for havin u in 38 this past year... u really made it an unforgettable exp for me. Fear not tho!! Paddy and Darcy's conglomerate still owns u!

ANW!! today... i worked! again!! But not as a kayakin instructor... but!! A 100% slacker..! yes! i got paid 20 singa for 4 hours to make people skip with rope 15 times and sign a check card. The stupid thing is.. it was in east coast. i Woke up at 5 bloody am aft watchin the eng v arg match, choinged on the bus to st pats and walked 2 km to the meetin place... Man.. i need to bring sum1 star gazin at east coast one day.. its raelly reallyy DAMN FREAKIN COOL! Anw.. its 8.49 pm.. the hour for dota has arrived folks!! Keep taggin!

The troubles in church

2005-11-12T15:39:00.000+08:00

I thot i'd take this post and bitch a lil abt church..

I'm quite against parents brinin in their children who really really just cant seem to shut the hell up. Their mummys and daddys bring food in for them to snack during mass. For all those who dunno what mass is, its where ur not supposed to eat, talk and just pay attention.. its sth like an examination....

Anw! The fact is... i think they should make a room or sth and stuff all the parents with toddlers there... its evil i know.. but at least u can concentrate religiously..

Ok.. now for some exciting news=)

My cousins from china, yes they are chinese from china, have come to further their education in lovely lil singapore. Its a crazy thing talkin to them because i cant understand anything they are sayin and they cant seem to understand what i'm sayin. I cant say i'm not surprised... the same thing happened for my O level and AO level chinese oral exams... DAMN i'm going CLb...
There are 2 of em, one is 19 and the other is 16 i think... but i swear they are soo skinny.... Not a problem tho:) my mission is to stuff them up. So i brought them to sushi the other day.. they didnt like it tho.. ARGH who can resist salmon sashimi??

We watched sky high and it was super super funny!! On a scale from 1 to 10 i think i'd rate it an 8. Obviously i'm a noob at blogging so if anyone can help me out.. can u teach me how to add a tagboard? I found a new blog skin tho!! But i dunno how to add it... darn.

Oh yeah!! *flashback* I cant believe my class won the best class award!!! i was sooo soo soo shocked! i mean, we.. thrashed the classroom, had 3 soccerballs confiscated for playin in class, we broke a window, destroyed the lights and etc etc... i got pictures!! they should be here somewhere... anw.. i am tired.. ttyl.

2005-11-10T21:03:00.000+08:00

Soo sorry!! I havent been able to write on a constant daily basis... just proves that DOTA is very very addictive.

So far, I have tried 2 new dishes at republic. I tried the Terriyaki and Wan Ton Mee=)
Anw.. today was quite a good day.. i woke up super late then i met up with my project work group at tiong bahru mrt station. I actually missed that stop and ended up in outram instead. The reason is a lil embarassing but i saw this group of pretty hot gals walk in at tiong bahru but i didnt know it was that stop.. so i stayed on to bird watch a lil when i finally realised what happened=) But but but!! fancy that! they stopped at outram too... prolly why i got offf anw.

Back to the main stuff.. i got off.. went to jeslyn's house which looks exactly like jane's house... are they sisters?? nvm..

I brought red-eyed leslie to republic with me to meet derek and lesmana... stupid man was soo late... gotta buy him a singaporean watch cos the indonesian ones dun seem to work well =)

Oh yeah.. yesterday i went to work! I was a kayakin instructor and i help teach lil sec2 kids how to kayak.. so fun! Hopefully i get paid tho... i kinda do need the $$.

Republic for 3 days in a row.

2005-11-04T21:02:00.000+08:00

Okay... here is the second post! Now for the Big thing abt this blog.

"darcy's guide to culinary happiness in town"

For now, we have a ranking system till more detail is acquired.

1) Food Republic @ Wisma Atria level 4.
Food here may be a little pricey but its for one of those times u feel that u need to give yourself something special. Go there with your loved ones or friends and perhaps share a pate of hokkien mee from the thye hong stall.

Pros
- Wide variety of food
- Very nostalgic back to the golden age ambience
- Quality of the food is good
- Wisma is strategically and geographically located in the heart of town
- Right next to Orchard MRT for those folk that are too stuffed to move

Cons
- Expensive ( Beed bulgolgi from the korean stall is S$8 and not very satisfying)
- Portions are not generous, which means that there they dont give u a lot
- Very crowded at lunch times (12pm to 2pm) and dinner times.
- Difficult and challenging to find seats
- Queue for the hokkien mee is ridiculously long at some times

2) Picnic @ Scotts
A good place to sit and enjoy the noise of working people. It tends to be a lil crowded but u get a seat 75% of the time. Come with ur friends and enjoy a healthy dessert at yami yoghurt. I personally recommend a medium peach with fruity pebbles. For S$4.95, this delicacy can burn a lil hole in ur pocket.

Pros
- Central
- It is conveniently located near the MRT of Orchard
- Not as pricey as Republic but as its town.. u cant escape my friend from town tax
- Good variety of cuisine

Cons
- Its crowded and noisy
- Tables are too close to each other which allows conflicts to happen
- Its in the basement

The beginning.

2005-11-03T21:05:00.000+08:00

Alas i'm starting my own blog. I must admit i used to think the idea of writing abt ur life and letting everyone see it a really stupid idea. But times change and so do i=) Anw, this blog of mine also happens to be an ultimate food guide to towning. I'm starting small and then i'll work my way up.. its just an experiment so dun kill me if i screw it up:)
Today was our beloved 1T38 Leslie's birthday! Poor guy.. spent the morning going to one of our project group member's house to finalise our oral presentation. I got a photo of him somewhere so i think i'll selate (slot) it in here somewhere. I think oral presentation is a bloody waste of time.. i think u peeps out there doin it or will be doin in the future will agree with me. Back to leslie's bday... we went to my BELOVED food republic to snack a lil... okay... snacked a LOT. Think abt it.. 2 plates of hokkien mee, 1 plate of oyster omellete and a plate of fried kuay teow. Mmmmm mmm! Delicious shit... i swear everyone MUST go there one day. We used our camera phones to take pictures of another classmate who really HATES having her pic taken. She kept molesting me to get my phone so that she could delete it. Pleasurable no doubt=) jk, she stopped and i have the picture=)
KK enough for now... i've dota-ed all the way so i gtg sleep now....